Nostalgia is a good thing and if I were to be honest it can also be a sad thing. Looking back was a game ender for Lot’s wife(Genesis 19:26)….silly woman! The one time she should have listened and minded! Ugh! I am not attempting to look back with sadness or regret, but ahead. This photo was taken at least forty-eight years ago(ugh again) and it is from a wonderful time in my life. I am the precocious little girl third from the left on the truck bed side, sitting.
This was pre divorce of my parents and pre death of a precious Uncle, J.T. and the stroke of my Papa…..As well as pre injury of my cousin Junior who in his early twenties fell from a construction sight nearly to his death, only to be paralyzed and has lived his life in a rest home. Sad days were ahead for our family but on this one day it was the best of days. All of the grandkids together with the exception of one who had not been born yet!
We were a fun bunch, and all of us together, having a day at Granny and Papa’s home was a rarity.
A few lived far away and those times when they were home were priceless. Even as we got older we lived for those days again and our tight knit group within the group would come together to “hang out.” We would spend the night at the gparents and eat great food, my granny cooked with lard! Oh the dangers of amazing biscuits and really sweet Tea…..chicken n dumplins’ and pie! Omg… Makes me crave even as I speak. Later we would go into town which used to be about an hour away from the country home but as it turns out… Only about fifteen minutes! Odd when that happens!
Being the cool college girl as I was! I would take my cousins to a party or cruise the town but it was not about where we went… It was about being together….laughing and loving and having the time if our lives. I think this kind of friendships are fleeting these days …we all live farther away and maybe it is just me but our families are scattered to and fro and I think we have lost something in that. Just like siblings, cousins can be some of our closest lifelong friends. I wish my own kids had that kind of bond with their cousins.
I have said this before publicly but I want to say it again… I love you all! Those times under the trees, playing tag and hide n seek were my most cherished memories. You all enriched my life and I hope that your memories are as good as mine. We had a great place to have fun and great grandparents. No matter what our parents think or say about them! (meaning no disrespect, I get they were their parents and they had hard times) They loved us all and loved all of us being there with them and I am a stronger person for the people who they were. I am from a tough family, courage and strength, faith and failures. All of which give me pause to say thank you.
Category Archives: enjoyment, encouragement
Frisbee kinda day!
Nothin’ better than sittin’ on the front porch watching three of your grown kids throwin’ a frisbee! These lazy peaceful Sundays are what make the other dreary days survivable… Even lessens stress and reminds you that the most simple of times are still the best.
These days when the sun isn’t so hot and the trees are budding leaves; birds are chirpin’ and our lil’ black…..thinks he’s a rotweiller! Dawg trips over his tongue from all the running. I have never seen a dog more interested in the chase than this one and would rather die than get a drink of water.
I am loving’ this tiny moment in time, it is what keeps a family strong. I will never be more thankful than to see my kids be best friends. They have learned the hard way that the four of them are the most trusted compadres and even when they are sworn enemies for the moment( usually boys against girl!)they would defend one another with the fierceness of warriors.
Of course this is usually when in opposition to us…the parents. Not much ever changes in the family dynamic which these days makes me even more thankful for my little piece of the pie. I am the luckiest momma in the world and I know it!
My prayer is they will always love/hate each other more than anyone else and remember no other people know what they all know collectively, the battles fought and the hearts broken; secrets kept as well as lives saved. Siblings are a unique group and it is still odd the differences in them even though the experiences were nearly the same. Ah birth order, you are a fickle fate!
But on this lazy afternoon of Scrabble, Sorry(a game of many screams and defeat!) and now frisbee, life couldn’t get much sweeter!
MOM or 666!
My darling daughter let me in on her private (not so much any more) secret that makes her giggle every time she calls me on her cell phone. I must say it is pretty funny although it does involve mean and cruel jokes at my expense. It appears that on her phone she can type the word MOM and the numbers that show up are 666!
“NO WAY!!!” I respond but, to my dismay it is true! Kinda makes you wonder about, way back when Alexander Graham Bell was toying with this new fangled idea of a way to communicate…the Telephone, he possibly…”accidentally”….. “on purpose”… worked it out that the “O” and “M” letters would be on the same key and end up with the dreaded sign of the ANTICHRIST! He could have quite easily had “M and N” on a number and let “O” dangle over there with “P”...I mean he was the one designing the darn thing!
Could it have been that the memories of his own sainted mother rang out in a nagging voice, during this time of inspiration and invention, reminding him of all the late night sessions of creativity of his godly mother (telling him to turn the light off and go to bed!)….who only loves her son Alex and wants him to get a good nights sleep and eat well and do good in school and meet a nice girl and settle down and…and…and….all those things mothers for centuries have wanted for their children…could it be that he might have possibly jumbled those letters up all on one number, just to have his own private joke?I shutter to think it and at the same time I would be so proud of him!
Or was this just the luck of the draw and became a treat for all those kids who just now and then need a laugh? Odds are good that is the case but it is comforting, as a mother, that my kids are overjoyed when they type my name in their phone and be reminded…..”don’t mess with ME….I am dangerous!!!” Children have really so little true power, ultimately we do hold the keys to the kingdom and it is little comfort to them to once in a while they get to …”stick it to the MAN!”…or MOM in this case.
It has not been that long ago (well, I am lying it has, go with me here!) that I was one of those kids and I too would have liked to get my mom once in a while. I seem to remember a dread full pleated skirt that I thought made be look huge…I was like 4’11” and weighed probably all of 98lbs….yep I was soooo huge! Makes me gag thinking how skinny I once was! But to me, then..those pleats all the way around that ugly skirt were awful! and I NEVER WORE THE SKIRT!…never even had the tags off, hung in my closet till it eventually disappeared. Send it to the poor girls around the world that “would love to have a nice ugly skirt”….but I did hear about it over and over…blah, blah,blah!
But because ..what goes around comes around, I too have my wars with my precious God sent angel face little girl and I think it probably was over an outfit. Funny how I have so little memories of those arguments with my own daughter…hmm, selective memory I would guess! The last time I mentioned that atrocious skirt of mine to my MOM she rolled her eyes and had no memories of it either….ouch, I feel ya Momma!
The great thing about this funny quip is that we all dial that MOM number a lot….and the coincidence is just that and I hope that my girl never stops. Just don’t fret I am a writer ya know! I have my ways to retaliate!!
GRACE
What is GRACE?
It is something I can not earn, I have no possibilities of containing or holding or even controlling, hence my fears. It is not a commodity but a gift.
Maybe I am the only one who has difficulty with gifts? I love to give them but it is hard to receive them! Is it false humility or real humility or what?
I have come to the conclusion it is a born-in-us feeling of unworthiness. As if, I haven’t earned it so why would anyone give me a gift? It is a skill to learn, to be a receiver of gifts. I still have a hard time with it but after many “awe shucks, you shouldn’t haves …” I am able to at least graciously accept it. It is rude to not, actually, and it is offensive to the giver.
The giver is a candidate for a blessing, that is what the Bible says — give and it shall be given to you, pressed down and running over (paraphrased). That sounds to me like it is pretty good. I can always take some running over of blessings.
In our life we have been receivers of many great blessings. We have been blessed to know many great people who have loved us unconditionally and have helped to make our lives a bit easier. Many times I have guilt because I feel like I want to be the giver — more. But one precious woman told me one day, “your family does give, everyday with your service.” In a way she kinda rebuked me but in kindness. She wanted me to know we were important and not to sell ourselves short. What we do does make a difference!
AHHH GRACE!
This life we have been called to live is an important one. Most days I feel less than worthy to even claim I am a follower of Christ. Bad press for Jesus I think and that he doesn’t need the headache of me dragging along taking up space. But NO, he loves me and allows me to stand for HIM in every day of my life.He is a big GOD and he can take even my worst days. It is all about HIM and making sure I don’t come to the end of my life without the knowledge that I have shown someone the way to truth.
Argue all you want — don’t knock it till you’ve tried it!
People are lined up saying the Bible is just a nice book written by men, mortal men (emphasis on men (not women)) but you show me someone who says that and I would bet that they have never read it in full! That is one thing I would wager to say is truth!
It is alive with a theme that runs from the table of contents to the maps — God is real, God is LOVE, Jesus is HIS SON, and salvation is through Jesus.
We can put whatever denominational name we want on GOD. It is all rubbish. I could care less if someone is a “kind” of Christian denomination. What I care about is, do you follow Jesus? Have you given HIM your whole heart? Do you make decisions based on your walk with the Lord?
The only way to do this is through GRACE.
I am unable to be a good person and I have proved that. Only through the GRACE of GOD can I be what HE has for me to be. And that is all I ever want.
Okay finished with my rant!
TOO SWEET
A beautiful sign of spring is the blooming of apple trees. I have never seen the blooming trees in Washington, D.C. (in person) but I would guess it is a sight to see. I will have to settle for the blooming apple trees at The Apple Barn in Pigeon Forge, TN.
This quaint but impressive orchard has been a family favorite with the “world of all things apple” — apple pie, caramel apples, apple cider, plus a candy kitchen with tons of different kinds, including: dark chocolate almond clusters (my personal favorite) and taffy (my daughters one-and-only want, peppermint!) so need I say more — apple Mecca!
Our visit today was short, our usual on the way out-of-town stop. We never go back home without our treats for the kids. No matter how old they get, it is still expected. But we spoiled them with that one! As a parent, it is comforting to know they still want that small treat. My boys love caramel apples the most, nuts and without or both, they are happy and easy to please.
As time ticks away the kids get older, mature, finally begin to show signs of what awesome people are to come. I knew they would tun out winners. We raised them right, no matter what propaganda they have tried to fabricate! It is their job to try every way in the world to defy us. Kids will be kids ya know. But I see the edge of the rainbow. I see a glimpse of what is to come and it is so much fun!
Just as the apple blossoms return every year, kids eventually get a clue, begin to evolve into the people we know they can be.
Whew!!!
Thanks Lord for allowing me to see the day it happens. Too sweet. Sweet as apple pie!
Peyton ….who needs ya!!
Not that I am any big sports fan and anyone that knows me can attest to that but, really Peyton? You have to know that all of Tennessee or at least the die-hard University of TN (GO VOLS!!!) fans were praying and fasting (which is ridiculous, btw)for their boy to come back home. Really, would you be surprised?
I lived in the Knoxville area for more than twenty-six years, I married an East TN boy, a die-hard UT fan, tried and true. I was there when you splashed on the scene to bring the VOLS home with victories….there was nobody like you. You were everywhere. We couldn’t turn on the television without enduring those sweet St. Mary’s Hospital commercials with you and the Nuns. Very quaint and endearing. You were the face of Knoxville at that time with the exception of Pat Head Summit, the VOLS Women’s BBall coach, the best one ever no less! And might I point out…hasn’t left us! Two words…LOY-AL!
So when you leave the Colts and go shopping around for a new team and you actually come on over and tease us this way….well that was just mean. Nashville, which is where we live now….and was my hometown area, was all giddy over the prospect of our Tennessee VOL hometown hero coming back to finish out here. Literally the place was all a Twitter! and Facebook, TV news reports, news papers and etcetera! etcetera! etcetera! as Willy Wonka would say! Once again, PEYTON FEVER! UGH!
My own dear saintly husband…the dyed in the wool UT fan, the man who made me denounce Vanderbilt before
he would marry me because, I was a VOLS fan NOW……….this poor man who works hard and has few carnal things he asks for, walks in the door today…his head hung low, barely able to take one more step……crushed in defeat!
“Honey what’s wrong” …I say in my sweet loving wife voice. He being a preacher I thought…… maybe he lost his favorite Bible or one our church folks were sick, or at least ……he lost his golf match (and I was sooo glad he went, good exercise and vitamin D) that he just came home from for which is the first time he has played in months and months. A big fat NO!
NO Peyton it’s all your fault! You in one single decision, selfishly and without any concern for all the fans who loyally have followed you “Through the Years”…….(picture in your head if you will…Kenny Rogers singing song by same name, for drama), Peyton you had the option to pay us all back in one fail swoop but NO! Selfishness is so ugly and I hope when it snows so deep where you are going you remember our nice mild winters here in the great State ofTennessee.
Sure Peyton, life will go on, my precious husband of thirty years will live to love another player, and as I comfort him in the sweet caring loving way that all who know me will be assured I will just repeat these words…….
Peyton…who needs ya!
p.s.
I don’t think our uniform looks very good on you anyways!
p.s.s
This was written in fun….I really could care less….just saying!
Soothes MY Soul
Today I spent some time at my Mom’s. It was later in the afternoon and I was getting a feeling for nap time! Mostly because her house is always warm, well to be honest it is HOT! But that is to be expected, she is elderly. I can’t believe I just called her that. Never in all my born days have I thought of my mom as elderly. She never has been until now. Truth be known, if she knew I called her that she would probably skin me alive!
I wish that she could know. I wish she was the same, quick to set things straight, lady I have always known. She is but a shadow of her former self. Her mind has retreated in so many ways and her momentary memory is all that is left. Thankfully she is in good health otherwise, for which I am so thankful, it would be more sorrowful if not. Even so, she is sweet and kindhearted now, two adjectives I would have thought of her in the past, just not as obvious. She was always a good woman, strong and forthright. But she wasn’t much drama, pretty much just a straight shooter. “Just the facts!” (I must be more like my Dad…all drama!)
The time I spend with her now is hard and taxing. The crazy part is that it has gotten hard for me just in the last few months. Before I was able to take it in stride, dealt with it pretty good before, and I even felt pretty proud of myself and felt the need to help my sisters wrap their heads around this disease. Pretty smug considering now it is a struggle for me. I am not sure why, maybe because the amount of loss we have had lately. Losing my sister-in-law to cancer last year took a toll on me I know.
Daily I miss her. Daily I search my mind for remnants of her. I still have the last four voice mails on my cell phone she sent me. I listen to them often as well as the last stream of texts. She was reminding me to be careful on the cruise we were about to board with all the mishaps, husbands and wives falling overboard and all. I think she had an over and under bet on me and her brother and if you knew her and us that would be believable. We constantly ragged her poor brother about everything — not that he ever knew it! It was our own little world. Her being his OLDER sister made for plenty of wars. He was pretty obnoxious I am sure as any little brother can be. I think their mom would make her take him on dates with her and her boyfriends! Recipe for murder I say!! SO who could blame them for their lack of warm fuzzies about each other! She would describe the little boy and I would defend the grown up man — a never-ending test of wills. I eventually won that battle and she agreed. She loved him despite herself which is the best ending of all.
I often remember the crazy conversations we had. One minute we would be deciding on what to cook our crews for supper and then without skipping a beat go into a story of our many yard sale adventures and my search EVERY TIME for a bathroom. YES, I did ask people to use theirs. She would go hide in the car, humiliated yet laughing her a#& off! (only word that can be used there, it is a Bible word, by the way! Just in case, forgive me Lord!) It would almost be a dare and the funny thing was people would let me. She would say she couldn’t believe I had the nerve to ask and I would say I couldn’t believe they would be so dumb to let me!! Me a stranger, though my only agenda was to potty and not have to leave such a good sale to drive a gazillion miles to a gas station. As a side bonus I did get to see some pretty cool houses! We were also famous for dragging home old furniture from the curbs….good times! The best of times and had I known they would be over so soon….whew makes me tear up again.
So when I go to my Mom’s house I guess I am realizing that the time will come when I will have to say good-bye to her. It is all so “in your face” this slow death. It is a fact of life that is a bitter pill. Not for the one who dies but for those of us left behind. I know where my sister-in-law is and I know she wouldn’t come back if given the choice but, still so very hard. Today her son made a funny (to me) comment on Facebook about a driver in front of him and I belly laughed because it was HER spit out! She, like me, was a verbal driver and had no patience for ignoramuses who pretend to know how to drive and when I read his comment it was hysterical.
Things like that give me comfort…maybe I am the only one, but when I hear or see something that reminds me of someone I love it is soothing to my soul. Her children do arise and call her blessed and every time I see a red bird — Cardinal — I am reminded of my Mom, though she doesn’t remember know that she used to love to see them. I do and it soothes my soul. I too will arise and call her blessed. 
After the storm
rainbows are magical and I love when we see them. I don’t believe there is one person, that when they catch that fleeting glimpse of one, they are not amazed and filled with even if only a tiny bit of awe and hope!
The sheer design is spectacular and it is one thing we can’t bottle up and keep, actually it changes even while watching it, pretty cool! Gosh now I am gushing nearly as much as the gone viral…double rainbow guy!….without the drama but still awesome to see.
PIE not PI…..!
In respect of PIE day I wanted to relay my favorite kind… It has to be apple! To be exact I only like the kind that is with pre cooked apples…not the kind that has been sliced fresh and layered in the pie shell with no goopie sugary sauce like stuff, it needs all the mushy flavorful cooked apple part. I am very picky about this fact as if anyone had ever wondered. It is a warm and yummy, cinnamon filled, crusty luscious goodness that is always first on my list of great desserts. I am not a huge dessert girl but if I do indulge it would be pie……I really like pie the best of all dessert! My mom made chocolate and coconut and lemon(3 separate pies!) that were to die for so it is hard to pick. I have the hidden recipes that are a family treasure, our inheritance. I learned to make my husbands dads favorite which was his moms specialty , custard pie. Not a fan but it did smell good! Once again … Cinnamon and nutmeg! A lady who was a family friend made a key lime pie that I shamelessly begged for whenever I could( funerals etc) and then when I delivered my only daughter, 24 years ago mind you, so good i still remember it, a lady from our church made me a Boston Creme Pie, oh my Lord! Not really pie but still as dreamy! LOVED it! My second son loves my fudge pie, not as good as an old restaurant that was in Nashville a ton of years ago, Ireland‘s but pretty dang good! I loved that place, the best little steak n biscuits ever and fudge pie of course. Yep, I would say I love pie, even cobbler will do, as long as I get a lot if crust…. Oh shout out to The Cracker Barrel too, they have a chocolate cobbler that is crazy good, I wouldn’t believe it but my husband made me try it, sold! Why do I doubt him? So in honor of PIE day…..I salute you, the real and only Pie I can understand!
I wish I had……
I wish I had hugged my granny and papa more. I wish I had known the last days on our farm were the last days. I wish I had known the days would get so much shorter as I got older. I wish the words my sister would say to me about all those Cokes catching up to me wouldn’t hover in my head as well as my hips.
I wish I would have continued playing tennis after college. I wish I had been a better student. I wish I had the nerve to really be what I was meant to be. I wish I had paid more attention to my feet. I wish I had given much more thought to the clothes I wore during my 20’s.
I wish I had not cared so much about what people thought of me. I wish I were a better woman. I wish I could spare my kids the pain of failures and hard headedness. I wish the gravitational pull wouldn’t concentrate on what seems like only my body all the time. I wish I had a million dollars. (Keeping it real here, everyone wishes for that, I might as well say it out loud!)
I wish spring was the constant season until a month of fall and skip straight through to spring again. I wish I had a zillion Daisies all over my yard to keep me smiling. I wish the politicians would shut up and get something done for once.
I wish Downton Abbey would play everyday on PBS and not end and make us wait so long for new season, as well as Mad Men! Speaking of television shows, I wish Sandra would come back on Property Virgins and Dallas would come back sooner and all my guilty pleasure shows would stay only slightly crazy and not go full on nuts. I wish somethings would never change.
I wish my tooth socket would hurry up and heal for Petes’s sake! I wish I had a maid. I wish I had a maid. (So good I had to wish it twice.) I wish our children would find the best girlfriends/boyfriend for them and live in love the rest of their lives. (A momma can dream big ya know.)
I wish the weight would just drop right off like the ad claims it would. I wish I could travel to NYC and live for about a month in a brownstone in a beautiful part of town like on You’ve Got Mail. I wish my blog would be read by lots of people and eventually be on FRESH PRESSED!
I wish I could watch cool birds in my back yard. I miss the huge Woodpecker that visited us for a season back at our old house as well as the little Blue Bird that is like the one on Snow White. I nearly cried it was so sweet.
I wish I could eat lobster again, and since I am on that subject shrimp and crab legs. I wish they were in abundance and not so expensive and I could eat them all the time along with great salads and vegetables – grilled.
I wish I could see again a few of my old friends from my younger days and it would be the same. I wish I was all shiny and new again. I wish everyone could get the whole GOD thing and I wish I got it better. I wish I could see a butterfly everyday. I wish I had a million dollars. (Bears repeating!)
I wish my hair would not go gray ever and be light blond highlights naturally like it was when I lived outside which brings me to I wish I wasn’t such an indoor person. I wish red-hot jaw breakers weren’t oh so Cinnamon-y — too hot! I wish I could sing really good. I wish I had my own computer that no one else ever uses.
I wish I could go back in time and have some do-overs. I wish I had a cat that never sheds and just cuddled. I wish I had the good sense I have now way back when. I wish I could talk to my daddy and I wish with that one that I will see him in heaven.
I wish I could go to the carnival that came every summer to Cowan TN, it was the best one ever and I wish I could belly laugh again while riding the Himalayan with my sister Jan. I wish I had been in the cool kids group in high school and not so awkward. (I was on the cusp of that crowd, just barely even noticed but just almost there.) I wish my son’s TV didn’t play constantly even when he isn’t home. Ugh! (Gotta’ go up the steps and search for the controller which is impossible.) Which brings me to – I wish I had found a one story home this time!
I wish LOVE was seen as a verb all the time and we spoke it daily. I wish it wasn’t so hard to wake up every day. I wish my sister that was two years older had not died when she was a baby. I bet we are a lot alike! I wish friends weren’t so hard to come by.
I wish I had watched my weight do more than quadruple. (Should a paid more attention to that one!!!) I wish I could wear Levi’s and plain white shirts all the time. I wish stuff didn’t bug me so much with my inner me screaming out all the time in my head just like the episodes of Seinfeld when Elaine is trapped on the subway and the power goes off and the train stops and she is trapped and begins to talk to herself in her head. (I do that all the time, nerve-racking! 0
I wish so many wishes that it will have to be continued.
I wish I had more patience to continue now
‘Til next time – I hope!
preacherswifeintheknow 