Tag Archives: Family

Never have I ever….

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I start this off with the words, never have I ever because it is how I felt all weekend. I do know what the phrase makes one think, the silly party game that people play but for me it is a thought of awe. I have been in awe of my beautiful life I have.

I know how that sounds, purely insipid and fake but it is actually true. They say to take time to smell the flowers but when do you ever, here in this crazy, busy world do we have the time. I suppose it may be because our kids are adults now, I’m not sure, but I know that when they are around it is the best of times.

While raising kids is the most magical time, watching them go through all the hard as well as fun twist and turns of growing up is one of those Olympic like sports that we all pray to get them past, when they are adults it’s so much more fun. This weekend they made the trip to the Burg to visit the old Mom, she turns a year older( hate when that happens!) but they honor me so much. Now that we live in this great house, though in the smack dab of the city it has enough yard to feel like a holiday resort.

My eldest built us a fire pit, the closest I ever come to camping since I have no wish to ever camp. Side bar: I grew up on a farm for the first ten years of my life, I loved my farm and my life as a kid there, barefoot and stringy blonde hair flying in the wind, but until age eight-ish we had NO INDOOR BATHROOM! Yep! A glorious stinky out house, so camping is out of the question for me, I’ve camped! But, a campfire in the back yard is the best invention and now since I got old again, my family went to the Amish and brought me a swing in a stand to sit and swing right by that beautiful fire. The best of both worlds…. With indoor plumbing.

When all the boys got home, we had a fire, they threw the frisbee’s down the hill to the frisbee golf net, they grilled the best chicken, boiled the best shrimp, and enjoyed a homemade banana pudding ( my Moms, recipe made by my oldest son, so she was with us too) this Mom could have ever asked for. How lucky am I? All I did was enjoy it. Taking in the moments and realizing how blessed I am. When they are little you wonder if we will survive!

The next day was a lot of lounging and throwing the football and frisbees around the still smouldering log, it still smelled so good, I sat on the swing and watched with my preacherman, both of us full with love watching these boys laugh and play. There all are still like twelve ten and five right! After, full with anticipation of “the big game!” (Yes, I ordered the chicken wings ahead of time) all so we can be ready to watch the University of Tennessee play Alabama and did we ever. This has to be the best football game I have ever watched… of course not that I on purpose watch football, only when my family does, but this was different. There had been a fifteen year dry spell .. Alabama is and has been a great team and kills us every year. Not this year SATAN!

Whew.. UT sweatshirts, tee shirts, hoodies and orange UT socks as well as baseball caps all in place and it was up and down the whole game, by the end my men were standing nearly the whole last half.. pacing back and forth, the preacherman retreated to his “hole” ( office) to listen and try to bring us luck.. I kept believing, hoping and praying for these kids who are playing their hearts out on that field. We almost had a group heart attack several times, we got quiet…then boom back on top again! It was fun! And just at the time we are fearing the worse… it happened.. they did it!! We won! What a kick, and the crowd goes wild! Fireworks and all, my boys jumped and hugged, preacherman came out of his hole and hugged them they are all screaming!

So, never have I ever had such a great weekend! There are tons of people with the same stories I know, these days of my life I take the time to watch and make note of the goodness of God. He got us here and I know that. My children are alive and thriving, they all love each other and actually love to be with each other, that in itself is an accomplishment. They are each others bff’s and we missed our girls or I know I did. Our daughter has left the pack to create her own pack as she should. But if I could she would live just down the road also, but we had her with us, on the phone, and our hearts and she and Ellie always will be. That was the only glitch in the wonderful weekend wheel but thanks to technology we talked constantly! Not the same but good for now.

These times keep us going, I’m old enough now to feel the feels my Mom did, watching her kids go to and fro, hoping they visit soon. I’m old enough to enjoy the birthday cards I received, knowing that some one thinks I’m special enough to remember. I’m old enough to just sit watch the leaves fall and never want to leave; I can waste away the hours keeping watch of the bird feeders seeing if we get a woodpecker or hopefully a bluebird! I’m old enough to know that I have been blessed to live near my children this long, I see why family’s “clan up“ and live on top of each other, nothing like it.

Never have I ever had so much fun, living my life in appreciation of who I am and who we, me and the preacherman have created. The life in ministry can be a struggle and it is, our kids have endured more than expected, it’s not their fault to be our kids, but I feel like they are the better, they know the real needs and real Jesus. It’s not a show and it’s a life of service. They too are servants, they have kindness and treat people well and to honor. Never have I ever dreamed I would have this life, but I do and I am forever grateful.

One year later

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One year ago today, October 5th, we purchased our home. One year later, I see the blessing in it all. Not that I didn’t already know, but as I sit here watching all the wildlife just in our back yard, our un-secret garden is a wonderland for so many birds, bees, butterflies; squirrels and groundhogs and to take the time to watch them work, is one of the most satisfying activities for the preacherman and myself.

When we knew we wanted to own our own home again after living seven years in the parsonage, the search began…. Something that I love to do… the hunt is all the fun! After a few maybes, I found it.. the one….the “only one!” But someone else found it also..grrrrr. They beat us out, better offer and such. I was sad but since I know that the lord is in control ( with me helping of course!) I just sucked it up, and let it go. Like a grown up, mature adult!

Does anyone know me? If you do you are laughing now because I had already decided that house was mine.. my sister and I had already thoroughly looked at it on line and in person, we arranged the furniture, planned the new flowers to plant, had visions of sugar plums dancing In our heads, already. This house was my house! I just needed the other people who rudely gave a better offer to back out.. it could happen! Maybe it will I prayed, maybe they will decide to not move her from the far off land they were moving from, silly out of staters! I let my realtor know I was here hoping and praying, I let her know ( several times, on the daily). Poor women who I only met house-hunting, who would eventually regret it I’m sure, has been pestered ( texted) to death by me.

Zip ahead a really long month, what’s taking them so long.. move in already or take down your sign y’all, nothing was happening there, not that I checked every day( that was not me driving around the block…noo! ) but, if this house is getting bought something needs to show it! No “pending “ sign or nothing! Ugh my impatience is in overdrive because no other house compares to this one, they all are just okay. Nothing special homes are a dime a dozen in the world and it was becoming obvious that I was going to be stuck with one.. once again I ask.. do you know me?

So one Tuesday I let my realtor know ,again, that if something should happen to cause the buyers to “change their minds” please tell them we want first dibs! Well, this was about the third time I had relayed this info as if she’s dumb or didn’t hear me or anything that could cause her to not know this obviously ridiculous request. It is a beautifully cool house how could they not want it? …. BUT.. the next day, on a Wednesday morning, the preacherman and I were at the church, praying never ceasing, interceding for the whole world, doing all the real Jesus stuff ya know… (ha!) and my phone rings!! She says… “ you are not going to believe it!!! They backed out!!” After much jumping up and down I reply.. calmly.. ( not) “ oh really, why?”…. Apparently they had to be in by a certain date and the repairs they needed done could not be done in time.. so they changed their minds!!!!!!!!

Then, we had to come back with our best offer, within a few hours.. they accepted and it was ours!! Holy smokes! Did y’all see that, the Lord moved a mountain! I immediately cried because all that hope became real..in real time, the real life God, gave us the dream. Not free of course but He supplied the capabilities to do this. I will forever know that this was a huge long shot, my realtor I think was also shocked, bless her heart, she worked for it, and continued to, during our laborious process, impatience on my part. I’m sure it wasn’t that bad? Hmmm, I kid, I kid! Now I know I was annoying to her, but she’s a friend now( I think) and we have had better days since then, I randomly text her over silly stuff and she actually answers back.

One year ago today, our family got our home, it is like a vacation home really, the most relaxing place on earth. It’s hard to leave it, the yard is a wonderful display of nature, we have added flowers and solar lights for the new paths, the screened porch is my favorite place besides the sunroom like windows in the family room where Leo the cat and Leesi the dog, watch all the activities outside with me. Today, the groundhog has the nerve to waddle right onto our side patio, sit up and snack on acorns from the huge trees we are blessed with and smirk at our inside animals… probably with pity! I honor the life in the yard, I honor the people who built this house in 1955… I honor the sweet lady who lived in and loved it for so long last.

Thank you to all who came before us, we will try our best to take care of it and enjoy the nature all around us. This is not a brag, in all humility I am thankful for the opportunity to be the caretaker for a little while. We are smack dab in the middle of this little city, in one of the original subdivisions but it feels like we are in the country. We are surrounded by joy and on this day I honor the day that we became caretakers of this special place. I know I can be a bit dramatic about it but seriously it is spectacular! Thank you Lord and a preacherman that follows my heart with me. We both are such bird nerds now. But so much fun!

Empty nesting

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Most of the time I am pretty content in my life, I can spend my time any way I want to usually…with in reason. I’m a grownup ya know! Since our four children grew up, that’s the way it’s been and it is the gift the Lord gives you for a “job well done!”…or some kind of yadda yadda!

The only catch is (for which I did not see coming!)…the dreaded grand kid… they don’t tell you what this one little kid can do to you. It’s a scam I tell ya! You assume you are all finished.. the fretting, the worry, the knowing that at any given second there could be a huge explosion or landslide or any equally torrential act of God that could take your precious children to heaven sooner than you want.. or at least cause a trip to the emergency room! No one warns you about the next level.. the grandchild…the even more gut wrenching fears that are so absurd they don’t even make movies about it. How do we survive it?

I have been so blessed to have my beautiful granddaughter right next to me.. for seven wonderful years…..the hugs and kisses and jam hands have been a way of life .. everyday. The glue.. the sparkles..the stickers all over every thing you own; a never ending amount of sippy cups and drink boxes and goldfish cracker smashed in all the nooks and crannies of the couch as well as too much candy and the inevitable puke session to follow. And that’s only the good stuff! My sweet girl was always sitting too close to me, always screaming “MAMAW” when I came home and running so fast to me she nearly knocked me down. I would Buy her so much stuff that one child could never play with it all, spoiling her so bad her mother had her hands full. I’m sorry( not sorry)

But now she is gone…. Far away in a far off land. She moved .. they moved…for some reason she wanted to go with her Mom.. I mean she had me, her Mamaw and even better her Papa! But she wanted to move away .. I mean you spoil a kid rotten and they turn on you.. what nerve. She is perfectly happy too! What gives.. hot beautiful weather, the beach a swimming pool, Target and Chick-fil-A only down the street! So what.. I mean if you like that kind of stuff? I do wish a Chick-fil-A would pop up here in the ‘Burg!

Of course I’m happy for her and her Mom( don’t get me started on her Mom) there’s not enough words to express my missing her.. I’m not crying, you’re crying! I’ll move on. They are on an adventure of a lifetime, they are happy and safe; they are good. Even more than that I know that my Lord is with them, taking care of them better than I can. I had to come to the place of understanding and reminded myself that God loves them even more than I do. He has brought them this far, He has kept us all from the tricks of the devil. He has assured me that my babies and also my grandchildren will be of His highest priority.

So this empty nest I am in is even more empty, more than it’s ever been. (By the way, I ain’t hating it!)(did I say that out loud?) It’s ok, thankfully we have “face time” for which my granddaughter who I know adores me sits and plays a game ignoring me as she face times me.. um you called me missy! Oh well, I see her beautiful smile and her gorgeous hair that I love to touch and kiss her head. I know she loves me as much as I love her, she’s a tough little girl and I know the next time I see her in person she will probably be bored with me pretty quickly. These days 7 is more like 12 yrs old and I’ll be okay because I know I had those first 7 years( I had to share her with everyone else but I made sure I was at the top of her pyramid…. Most days!

I thank the Lord for my nest, my preacher bird, for my baby birds and for my sweet little chickadee. She is in good hands, with her sweet Mom, taking steps in faith for a wonderful life. They got this and even more Gods got them. I still miss the hound out of them!

A change

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This is a torrid tale of a hot pink bathroom that was larger than life and a room with a view. there was a change coming and it was the greatest pleasure to watch it unfold. Home repair/redo/rehab is not the cool cable show that I watch..or is it! After the finished product, like childbirth, the memory tends to waiver and all you know is the satisfaction of it being done. I am now a few weeks out, past labor.. past the aches and pains for which were all worth it with the only bad memory I have is the actual moving day. This is a memory I choose to forget, it all didn’t make the trip, I dropped the ball on a few important items that I think I donated. Shhhh, let’s not talk about it anymore!

Fiddle-de-dee as Scarlet O’Hara said..enough of that, now some before and after! I do have pictures for which I can’t figure out how to add, still working on it. This house is like living in a super cool vacation home. It is gorgeous.. it is old, but still lovely.

Hot pink and black
But look how pretty now!
This!
To this!
Kitchen divider poles….
No poles and a walnut butcher block counter!
My lovely view!
My beautiful screened porch
My beautiful granddaughter spying on the squirrels
New walls with shiplap.. yeah I’m cool too!
New office for the preacherman
I could not love a room more..even still cluttered!
Such a pretty view
Cute pendent lights

Ok so not finished yet but what is, I’m loving. So just a tidbit of my story…one day Better Homes and Gardens will be knocking to do a full layout I bet! Until then I’ll just lounge in the home where my heart is….me and my preacherman!

Home

I am thankful to my husband who saw my vision, to my oldest son( handyman) who put his blood, sweat and tears into our new home, and to the rest of my family who dreamed with me. A girl can’t live without her sister(s) and daughters and sons who help so much. Most of all, my Jesus who provides all I could ever ask for or need.

A Life Well Lived

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To say that someone got their money’s worth is an understatement when it comes to my mother-in-law. There has never been a woman more motivated or curious in life as her. The whole concept of “let’s chill!” was never in her wheelhouse. She “got her money’s worth” out of the life she lived, and at age ninety-two, she remained vigilant until the end.

We were fortunate to have the last four months with her in our home (not without a battle mind you , it only took us nine years to convince her to come). She knew when she was ready, she would come. And near the end of December 2020, she was finally willing to move in with us. We were blessed to be able to minister to her with love and compassion, as she taught us about life and death, which is still a great mystery to me (the death part, I mean). As I sat there watching her only son cry and pray, sing and worship, even during his loss, and her only granddaughter take such sweet care of her, I ponder this great mystery. It’s just a faint breath between the two – life and death, earth and heaven – but it gives me hope to know we will meet again.

We spoke words of comfort, and thankfulness, appreciative of all the lessons she taught us. I’m reminded of those last moments I was with my own Mom, nothing more precious. Watching my husband’s heart full of sadness is harder. He was a fine son, and he did his best to honor her, which he did. I feel confident when I’m at that point he will love me with as much warmth and kindness as he did his Mom.

I am honored to love a man with so much sweetness in his heart. He treasured his parents so much, and he was the best son. He gave honor to his parents, and to the Lord, for them adopting him. Now for a season, like me, he is parentless. But he is not alone; we have each other and we have Jesus. I’m good with that.

His Mom was a world traveler (seriously, she was), from Paris to Kenya, and all parts inbetween. She was an amazing quilter, embroider, and crafter. She was a good cook. She taught me the whole Thanksgiving meal, which was the first meal I had eaten with her. I was impressed! The best Angel biscuits, Swiss steak, okra and coconut cake. All my favorites! And most of all, she had the gift of hospitality. One of the fruit of the Spirit, by the way, that has been lost in the shuffle these days. She taught me that, too, but way better than me. Never a person who entered the doors of her church that did not get an invitation to her home…that day even… what?! Yes, she had the immeasurable gift to welcome strangers, and maybe even angels unaware? She is known for her commitment for people to be wanted and cared for. Her heart was for world missions, and she worked hard to support missionaries near and far. She had them to her home for meals or to stay over for the night. All guest preachers who passed through, as well as the random people she met along the way, sat around her table. Endurance was her middle name. This, all while raising two children and working as an educator to grammar school-age-kids for forty-two years! (what?) Yes, she was a go getter. She told me that she nearly died as a baby, and only after they removed her tonsils did she even start to gain normal weight. Yet she forged on and never stopped. She knew life was but just a vapor and she wanted to live the best she could.

I write this in honor of her, thanking her for the impact she had on my life. She was one of the first to plant the seed of Jesus in my mind and eventually to my heart. She was a good mother-in-law to me. And she gave a good man to love me. I pray that her influence lives on through her grandchildren and great grandchildren. If you knew her, you can appreciate the remarkably strong, vibrant woman she was – even when it wasn’t cool for us girls to be so independent. She ran that pop stand and told you your job too. She was invincible! But she always honored her husband and her Lord. She was reverent to what deserved to have reverence. Her joy was in people. She was filled with that joy until the end.

Now she is home, with her beloved Jesus, husband and the rest of her people. I’m sure she will have something to add to that big supper we all will have someday. She will at least help get it organized! God Bless her heart.

Midnight

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I am not sure why BABIES pick the most awkward time to be born….. Probably to prepare us for life with a baby. Of course my first experience was just this way…at the stroke of midnight just after I had lay down to rest my swollen feet(whole body!)… HERE COMES THE BOOM!

After dragging his feet a solid month, yep a month late, he….the blessed boy child decides to show up. Not that I am complaining mind you, I began to think he would just stay there until first grade! Being my first one it took some time, hurry up and wait we did, hospital nurse replied……..“just rest a bit and come in around five…a.m.!!! Seriously, wait five hours.…I might explode, I could burst…..I mean I already had the worst thing ever..ya know the water breaking trauma…..nothing prepares one for this!

Wait we did, starring at each other, my husband of almost two years and I ..truth be known probably thinking…….what have we gotten ourselves into? Too excited to really think about it, we jumped in the car, his awesome Trans Am( do they make those anymore?) until you have to cram a carseat in it!!!!……Which we soon sold for, I am sad to say…a older Buick. Growing up has its downside!…….On this day we were off to get a baby, one way or the other.

By 9:00 am the doctor exploded into my room exclaiming we had to “get this baby out!”... geez, he scared us to death, we were both snoozing, I had NO PAIN, NO CONTRACTIONS, NO FUTURE HOPES OF DELIVERY….this was easy, couldn’t figure why I heard so much fuss about it! Little did I know we were in for some drama, gonna have a C-section..oops, that was not planned on.

By 1:15 pm I hear my baby screaming, and I felt like t h e Scarecrow from the WIZARD OF OZ, in the scene where they are re-stuffing him with hay! Clanking and whooshing and people scurrying around and ..“what a big baby!” He didn’t look so bad, nearly grown! A month late does a boy good.

Five whole days in the hospital(this was before the days of new insurance regulations), feeling very special and pampered, periodically (they stayed in the nursery a lot back then) cuddling my newborn… heart of my heart, my very own opportunity to do it right, to love him and protect him and keep all things that could hurt him at bay. I would be different from my own parents.

Thirty years later, now I know, my parents did the best they knew how…and so did I. He grew up, my pride and joy, king of the hill, no one had a more beautiful son, just ask me I would have told you! Then I had the next three, all were equally perfect and adored and beautiful…..I did the best I knew how. GOD knows every parents heart is  to do the best we can by our kids, he helps us along the way.

I know HIS HAND is and has always been on all of them, this young son was the first one, he suffered all the trials and errors of first-time parents and has come out still strong and maybe stronger. I believe our kids are the best and worst of us and I find this to be true still. I can only hope that he will rise above his raising and be bolder and stronger than his daddy and me.

me and will Happy Birthday beautiful boy, man child, first always, never forget where you came from and who loves you.

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Tradition

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This year my family traveled to visit our family for Thanksgiving in East Tennessee. This is never my first choice, to travel I mean, I am a home body as a rule and especially on a big holiday. I like to be the one doing the cooking. This year though, it worked out for us to go so we did.

My side of the family had a reunion a couple of weeks ago instead of the usual Thanksgiving celebration. We were blessed to have our precious Uncle Leon and Aunt Ornella as well as cousins John and Susan, which is always a special treat for us all. They have always lived far away so when they come home it is always a joy. My Aunt and Uncle are getting up in years and I have to catch myself when I hug them to not hug too hard because the thought always crosses my mind that this may be the last time. Morbid I know. Just trying to be prepared and enjoy them as long as I can.

It is not my intent, but I rarely get to see them and I just can’t bear the thought…..I as well feel this way about a lot of people in my life. We never know when this may be the last hug or laugh or words. Since my Mom has spent the last few years becoming less and less capable of knowing all of us, I am ever mindful of just how short life is.

Energizer Bunny

This became even more relevant to me yesterday during our visit to my mother in laws home. I don’t see here as often now and when I do, it is always shocking at the amount of “slowing down” she has done. If you had asked me if it ever would have happened I would have never believed it, she was the Energizer Bunny before the bunny was….she never knew how to rest, take it easy…..always doing something. Even at a time of relaxation, she would be embroidering.

I learned how to cook for the most part from her. When I married the preacherman and moved to his hometown and was thrust amongst all the good cookin’ church ladies and I was enlightened to the world of casseroles and some of the best in Southern cooking. I mastered the Thanksgiving Dinner from my mother in law, this was the first food of hers I had ever eaten….on a trip there with my room-mate(pre-marriage) to see University of Tennessee vs Vanderbilt. Reason number twenty-eight on why I went…got to see boyfriend and check out his hometown. Mission accomplished and some great food for us hungry college kids!

It was evident this week that she is slowing down, she was more frail and smaller…..just like my own Mom, although my Moms mind is failing her, my Mom in law is still pretty sharp. It is just her body that is tuckering out. But I swear if she still wont hardly let me help her….frustrating. What is it about the

English: at 955 Airport Boulevard, near , in .
English: at 955 Airport Boulevard, near , in . (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

elderly that makes them not stop or rather allow us to help. I hope I will be different, I hope I allow my kids to do all they can……or maybe that is how I feel now, sorry kids!

We had our lunch at a local, very popular restaurant, The Cracker Barrel. I was amazed at the amount of people who ate out for their Traditional Thanksgiving meal.  Do people not cook anymore? The over whelming part also was the amount of elderly people. I know this restaurant is a favorite of

the elderly as well as the Hardee’s breakfast, but it seemed there was mostly older folks. It actually made me sad and wonder…..where are all the children that go with these people. Did they choose to not be there with the Moms and Dads or maybe just like us went to the other side of the families dinner. I don’t know, it just seemed like of all the people there, ninety percent of them were older.

Maybe they have just “been there done that”, cooked the big meals, had the big house destroying family get together’s, broke the bank on all the pretty foods and accessories……maybe they are happy going out to eat and just driving home, in peace and quiet. I just don’t know. I think I was the only one who even cared, probably because two of my brood were not with us, I missed them and I missed not cooking for them all. My romantic view of life tends to get the best of me when I miss my kids.

On a side note: …..I also do not even want to obsess over the amount of people who play with those little wooden games with the golf tees that are on every table; the ones that have been scattered on the floor a zillion times and put back on the table and never disinfected. Then, while I watched people over and over touch those germ laced games and then pick up their fresh hot biscuits and jelly and eat them with the same dirty fingers……ugh, STOP!   STOP I would think, yelling in my head…..then I notice my own people doing the same thing….just as I had also done before…..ewe, wish I had not remembered that part…….I must have been tired, obsessing about all that. Some days it just doesn’t help to think so much!

So in the end, I chose pork chops for my special holiday meal….seemed to be a good choice, it had to be made fresh and it was good… unlike the big piles of turkey and vats of gravy and pans of mashed potatoes that have been made for hours …there I go obsessing again! I also knew I had a great home cooked meal waiting for me in a few hours when we traveled back home at my own Mom and sisters house. Happy to report is was awesome!

Thanksgiving deems to be getting squished out with all the shopping deals….I have never shopped on this day, truthfully, I have never had a large supply of money to do shopping with and I am also pretty protective of sleep and I have large crows issues…someone always gets trampled…..it ain’t gonna be me, sista! I have great Thanksgiving memories….a day for slowing down, a long weekend, throwing a football. Watching the parades and dreaming of living in New York……oh to be a kid again, the truth is my days are numbered and I know it. Soon I too will be enjoying my meals where everyone knows my name…..not CHEERS!…but my local Cracker Barrel!

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A good day!

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While driving back this afternoon to East Tennessee, to attend the wedding of a sweet young couple, I was honored to witness the beautiful fall trees. The color was only really pretty at the highest point, the plateau, between Cookeville/Crossville but for a few miles it was a real treat.

Crimson red, auburn, fire hot magenta’s, golden rod and butter yellows, all the brilliant hues that make fall my favorite season. I caused me to ponder (for which I do way too much!) about my life and that at my present age it feels as if I am in the fall of my life. Since this is my favorite season I am not so upset…..with the exception of the season to follow(I will not think of that now though!)

My drive was so nice…bright sunshine and clear blue skies, a great afternoon for driving. The trees were a great bonus to a day filled with happiness for this sweet couple. Their life is only beginning, many days ahead for them making friends and memories. My life has been so much richer for all the people I have met and who I have loved and been loved by over my life.

I was honored to be with some of my old friends on this “sunshiney”wedding day and I have to say it nourished my soul in a way they will never know. It seems that we live so many lives in our one lifetime. As I sat there taking in the joy of fellowship with my posse of friends, I was overcome with the knowledge that I have been so fortunate to have been a part of their lives also.

We talked about funny stories of past experiences and concurred that the funniest things happen in church….seriously if you don’t believe be I have some doozies! The (MY)preacher-mans grandfather always said…”give me my flowers before I die, they do me no good then!” He was the funniest person ever and was so right and I try to follow his pattern. He was a person who did this to those of us he loved. He would always remind me of the first time he met me and that he loved me from the start. Sweet man!

So today I sat with Ed and Jane Hardin, people who nearly raised me and my preacherman, in ministry…they were our most avid supporters, friends, but more like parents. Our lives were crisscrossed over and over, their love was not lacking to us and our children, we were their family, one of their own and they were ours. They made an impact on our lives and will always be Elders in our lives. I honor them and pray blessings on them and all their children and grand children. They also make the best New Years Day feast of anyone I know. I miss that gumbo and boiled shrimp and think of it often…maybe even more than my dear friends….ha ha sorry, I do love my seafood!

Then there is Mike and Denise Yannacone….these two have kept our kids for weeks on

A "Zeedonk", a zebra/donkey hybrid
A “Zeedonk”, a zebra/donkey hybrid (Photo credit: Wikipedia

end)and taken our mutts(dogs not kids!) after I kicked them to the curb (avid animal lovers…suckers in my book! ha)They are our mountain vacation buddies…any one ever seen a Zonkey? They throw great farm parties…skeet shooting and cookouts. They have been friends of great measure, always loving us and standing in the gap, prayer warriors and just a whole bunch of fun. She always remembers my birthday…every year (I am very impressed with that) (because I am awful at that) and someone who I know loves me like a sister. They are good people and I am honored to know them.

The wedding was for the daughter of our most dear ones….not playing favorites, but that was already mapped out before the earth was formed or …at least before I married the preacher man. Wendell has been the preachers life long best friend. They grew up side by side in that tiny town, he was Johnny Paul to my husband’s Opie…. so to speak! It is a toss-up which one of them had the more mischievous mind and probably equal by comparison. Wendell had the good sense and fortune to marry a beautiful woman after being left with four kids in tow. Cheryl was the bright spot for a family who needed loving.

She has been dear to me since I met her. She came by good referral….Wendell’s preciousMom picked her out for him and on a fluke it worked out. I say this because he ain’t that good…..but she is!(ha ha)She was the best step mom any kid could ever have and the best friend I could ever have. She has been a better friend to me than I have ever been to her.

She has hauled my sick gall bladder to the hospital, fought to have me thoroughly checkedout….thankfully because they were going to send me home, cleaned up probably every one of my kids puke…on her floors and furniture to make it worse, helped me with every crazy adventure I have ever gone on, prayed with me, walked with me, held my hand and held me up during the best and worst of times. She is my sister as much as my blood sisters, she even cleaned out stinky rotted fish from my freezer when I had moved away, which I don’t think my blood sister would have done and I know I wouldn’t have done. I am not as good a friend as her nor person.

She is my family! And in many ways all the people I have in my life are too. If I am allowed to be your friend I will be; I don’t allow miles to stop that. My friends have impacted me in ways they never could know and I have learned so much from them all. There are more in my heart near and far, all of which I value and cherish.

Today was a good day for me, I wanted one thing. To be there in some small way for my friend, like she has always been there for me. I didn’t really help her much, did little this and that’s but I showed up and was blessed with a bounty of love and adoration from my peep’s from the past thirty years. My friend Debbie who was a lifeline for me in a time of transition, she was an anchor and the best haircut ever…but more than that she loved me and never judged me as well as defended her friends on every front. I value her and love her. Then, our whole gang who took us in when we were lonesome and in need of a home, a church family and Pastor who too, loved us and let God be God.

That is how it is with people who have a love for God that is real and alive. People who give their hearts and hugs and time and gifts to build up and not tear down. There are too many to name; our lives are so inter-twinned over the years, people have come for a season, some have stood the test of time. All have been cherished and my life has been more rich for knowing them all.

I think I do like the “fall” of my life, I feel more settled and sure of myself. I have been there and back and survived. A bit more wear and tear than I wanted, I meant to take better care but ya know I have had a blast! At least most of the time, the good always out weighs the bad. My fifty-three years …I mean forty-three years …..oops! I forgot I am in the going backward stage! Actually, I don’t fret my age it’s more my over-all breaking down, limb by limb. Now that’s a bummer! Should have been more of an “outdoor Person!”(thanks for that observation Ellis kids…grrr!)

SO…..thank you Lord for my long life of ups and downs and please allow fall to hang around a little longer!

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Lil’ Red Caboose!

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On the day the doctor told me I was …once again.…with child, I was excited, for a little while…in public, then when we got into our car on the way home…..I cried! My baby daddy of now FOUR(ugh!) just laughed and said….“this is what you do best…be a Mommy!” At the time it was comforting and made me smile(if I were in my right mind I would have been offended…I am more than a mommy…really?!!!but my women’s lib badge was in the wash right then…I needed the encouragement!) and know that I could do this all over again….after a nine year gap….AGAIN!

After the sweet feeling wore off and reality set in I started down the road of pregnancy…AGAIN! In all honesty, before the Lord I must admit….I was not very surprised. Truth be known, I had been hit or miss with my pill taking and had been sick and taken a run of antibiotics and then on top of that….I was sorta “itchin'” to have another one. Let’s just say a pre mid-life crisis crisis!

I just didn’t feel finished…notice I use the word “I” not WE! Poor husband didn’t know what I had going on in my brain and heart. But the Lord did…..during this time, we had five or so women in our church that had been told they could not have a baby….but the Lord knew the desire of their hearts and they all got pregnant…..and I think it was in those free flowing waters that got all stirred up that I tip toed in and here comes our little caboose!

Honestly though it was great! The other kids were 12, 10 and 9, good ages to have fun with a baby brother and after the initial shock and awe was gone we all were so happy. This caboose as we call him was to be the LAST…..I promised! And to back it up…I tied everything up then with a two year later removal of all ovens and utensils…kitchen was closed. End of trail for the baby train, our lil’ red caboose was here and we were done.

Obviously, this kid was the best one yet….never needed for anything, didnt need his legs because we carried him everywhere…didn’t need his hand because we fed him…all his daily wants and needs were took care of by his band of brothers and one patient sister who played babies like a pro. He did eventually learn to do for himself, they all grew up but he was and still is the baby.

Maybe because he was raised with older siblings, but he has always been easy going and compilable. I think he is like me on that one (joke) I too am the baby in my family and I never got one spanking, like caboose…..we both are pretty perfect!! Just saying! He has been a joy to watch grow up.

He is now in the teenage years, sixteen by a few weeks now, and he made a commitment to work at a video game store in our town, five years ago when we moved here. Moving was hard on our little caboose, leaving his home of ten years, and when we came here, the guys at the local GAMESTOP became his buddies. The manager, who is a younger guy with two small kids, is a great guy and has always been a friend to him. Caboose would go there and hang out while I was shopping at Target every chance he got. They allowed him too because beyond anything else he is so funny and they loved to have him around. He would also tell him that when he was old enough he would hire him.

This was enough to keep my little man going, patiently waiting until he could apply and this week he did apply and today had an interview and was hired!!! Three cheers for our newly fiscally sound son. WooHoo!!! Yes….. I do have ulterior motives….one of these kids has gotta make it big…I am getting older by the second and who the heck’s gonna take care of me?

HIRED!!!!

SO this little tribute to my last kid in a line of great kids is one of great pride and I give praise to a God who always take care of us, gives us what we need as well as our wants and proved this on this day even the desires of our hearts. Work hard young man, I need a lot of taking care of! Only joking, Son……….(she says only to keep up appearances….!)

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Puke and Potato soup…a day in the life.

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Sometimes when you wake up in the morning, you never know what will unfold. On this day it began in a rush so common sense tells me to proceed with caution.

After meticulously reminding myself last night, to change my alarm for the next morning, because I was to help a friend with an impending surgery…I was to be her person, in case of emergency person…the one who would take care of her and comfort her and just be there. This is a matter for which I take very seriously, someone trusts me and darn if I am not going to fail them!

But……so goes my best efforts and I set my alarm for an hour later than I needed to be awake!!! AUGH! Really…I did that….I kept tossing and turning this morning, feeling like something was wrong…having the same dream sequence over and over, short little tidbit but the same tidbits of a dream, when I then heard my cell phone “beep” a message!!!! AHHHHH darn it!! Here we go, the “Home Alone” skit…I actually did this. Oh my word what a numb skull!

The moment I heard that beep I knew…..I had actually set my alarm wrong….by a whole hour….can I say too much on my mind at one time? SO I set forth in a mad rush grabbing my jeans and thank the Lord I had a decent shirt to wear…actually ready and brushed my teeth, ran a brush through my hair…out the door! My poor sweet friend was just standing there…smiling sweetly, unlike me who had the roles been reversed I would have been smiling yet mocking her in the worst way. She is such a better person than me..I already knew that though.

The grace for me is that she lives like….next door so no travel time and the hospital is like down the street not far, only a hop, skip and a jump actually so all in all we weren’t too late. (that’s my rationality anyways!) I drop her off at the door and park. She was waiting for me and we went in the waiting room. In not too many minutes they took her back…whew, gave me a few minutes to sit and wake up….and remind myself what a rat-fink I am…..and I try so hard not to be!

So here I go, they take me back to sit with her…as I walk down the hall full of sick people, attempting to over come every bit of nervousness I have in times like these…walking staring straight ahead, then I look to the left and see a little girl waiting for surgery I assume….drats, I looked! broke my own rule…makes me sad to see kids in hospitals….then I see my friend, laying there sweetly beginning to enjoy the chill out from the meds they gave her. Lucky girl!

As time past, watching her go in and out of loopy-ness was amusing, I am above all the most mocking friend anyone could have….I have no mercy but I did refrain from taking a picture, you are welcome! I feel the need to have my sista’s back on that one and also I know that would come back to haunt me one day! As we sat there, me trying to get her mind off of the impending “going under the knife” by babbling on about this and that and her smiling sweetly (she does this even without the good meds!) she is a very nice person, I began to remember the people in my life that have been there for me at these trying times.

One of which is my best friend Cheryl…married to my preacherman’s life-long best friend (I haven’t held that against her…actually made me love her more…he is a pill…as is the preacherman, they were a team apparently!) Cheryl, has selflessly given to me more love and compassion and blood, sweat and tears than any one I know. She has hauled my sick gall bladder to the hospital, after planning me a surprise birthday party, at my preachermans request, because he was out of town with his sick dad (it was an emergency!) Needless to say she had gone above and beyond that day!

And I have to give credit to her husband for gallantly looking after my brood of kids(4) for which my daughter puked all over the house because she was nervous about me being sick! He cleaned it all up, took care of them all, fed them, spent the nite and shared his beloved with me. Dang it….I hate when I have to brag on him! He is a keeper though and a great friend and person. (okay it is in writing now….enjoy it!)

There have been too many occasions when my friend has gotten me out of a jam…been the one who took care of me and been my sole friend at times….she has lived the life of a servant of GOD that most of us never even attempt. Today I tried to pay forward the love and compassion that she has patterned before me and to me and my family.I know that I fall short in comparison (might I remind of the oversleeping incident!) but I saw today what it takes to truly serve as the Lord would have us to.

Spending the whole day at a hospital (because they take their time there…really people can ya walk a bit faster?….sorry, I digress!) reminds one of the health we take for granted and the blessing of family and friends. I did nothing heroic (besides not impatiently tapping my foot whilst the nurse slowwly works her way to us…oops, there I go!) I just did what needed to be done for a precious friend.

We did have our funny times, Lucy and Ethel not withstanding, anytime I am involved there will be drama….but she is a good patient, better than me! All that loopy-ness caught up with her by the time we got her home…and I didn’t even take the curves fast…for real! Pain meds can be an evil twin at times and those two Popsicle‘s for which she loved…well…. lets just say she will want to clean up on isle two…behind that pretty leather couch of hers probably lies a puddle. Bless her heart I was running around like a crazy person…where is a bucket when ya need one?

She felt better afterwards, so it was worth it…nausea goes along with it all and I say get that off your tummy…I must admit puke breeds puke usually in me, but not this time, I was a trooper. Thank the Lord! She was so apologetic….bless her heart this was not needed, I felt so sorry for her. I remember well myself having the same response to that kind of medicine… it ain’t no picnic!

I left her to rest and get a little bit of peace and quiet, went home and made her some comfort food, potato soup, soupy and mushy for her fragile throat (she probably wont be able to stomach that till tomorrow and also some for her men folk. Nothing worse than the Mom sick and having to worry about the helpless men…hungry…starving…..barely able to lift their heads up. Yes I know I am mean but I have four men I have taken care of…..they have all kinds of virtue but they are all still little boys when momma is sick.

So goes a day in the life. I am thankful for my friends that have had my back in my life, they all have served the Lord with love and grace. I hope I pay it forward to the people in my life, if only in a small way. People think sometimes that real ministry is in front of a huge crowd of adoring people…….NOPE. Ministry is unto the least of these and I have been the least of these lots of times. I am well aware of those who have sacrificed for me so it is a blessing to help someone myself.

Thanks Lord for the opportunity!

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