Category Archives: GOD

Listen up!


The Band Perry EP The Band Perry EP (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

There is a beautiful song that has been on the charts for a while by a group called, The Band Perry, that is so haunting. I had to listen to it a few times to really get it…then I had to Google the lyrics because there was one line that is stellar! The lines are so good yet sad all at the same time.

No truer statement has been penned and I have included it here(in bold):

The Band Perry

A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I’ll sell ’em for a dollar
They’re worth so much more after I’m a goner
And maybe then you’ll hear the words I been singin’
Funny when you’re dead how people start listenin’

As a Mother I can relate to this line and even more, as a writer I can really feel it. Day in day out I type and ponder and attempt to bear my soul and share my heart. Maybe I am mistaken to do this, probably am…but this is just how I roll.

I guess I am attempting to record my memories and voice for my children and grandchildren, or at least I like to tell myself that. SO kids, did you know that Daisies are my very favorite flower, above all others? Did you know that my greatest joy is seeing your smiles? Did you know I have had the most fun of anyone you will ever know, in my life?…..as well as great sadness? Did you know that my need to be heard is so overwhelming it occupies too many of my thoughts…every day?.

The happiest flower in the world

Actually, if I were to be real about it….I have a voice and I know how to use it! If I am the only one who reads it..okay! After I started reading other blogs I saw that I am not so profound at all, not that I thought I was but I see that I am no different than most other people.

Most of us don’t actually live up to our gifting and abilities and seem to look forward to what can be…someday. This exercise in telling of my life is one step in doing what feels right for me. I also think it is probably the calm before the storm. I figure one day I will not be able to keep the filter up so well and really tell it like it is!

That will be when they take my computer away from me and I will have to kick it old school again with paper and pen journaling…..at this point it seems like such a daunting way to do it. Can’t believe I ever wrote all those words. Someday they will find them and confirm that I really was crazy!

It would be nice though if people would start listenin’ now!

Senior Citizens aka old folks


Today I was on my way home from my Mom’s house, after enjoying the little time with her while she still remembers me, walking her yard and looking at all her many flowers. I have commented before how she is this amazing ‘flower-whisperer’ — and I do wish that was the gift that she had given me — but, NO! I do love them as much as her but the ability to stick a lone seed in the rough dirt and grow an abundance of beautiful flowers … well that gene must have skipped me! Try as I might I only have about a tenth of her success … probably because of the dirt and rain and sun, no help from me!Image It is something that causes me to marvel at her ability to get up everyday and do her chores and at eighty-three it is a blessing she still can.

This brings me to the … on the way home part! I pulled up to a stop light in the rural part of two towns that are seemingly conjoined and I spied an old man, sitting in an old school wheel chair out near the road, pulling a pretty good size tree limb as best he could. Backing up, scooting his feet backwards, hauling that dead tree limb across his yard! With each little scoot of his heel in that kind-of-high grass, he pulled with his one good arm, the other looked paralyzed, but with all he could , he was clearing his yard of debris. It seemed impossible for the wheels to turn very well and it made me tired just watching him.

So as I sat there at thisImage traffic light, in my nice car with air conditioning, a body that is without any known conditions (I am usually holding out hope for a reason for my “out-of-shaped-ness”) (besides the obvious! which is my point) and I am humbled by him. I watched him and he watched me, or I felt like he was … guilt I am sure! He had on dark glasses and what appeared to be not so many teeth and it reminded me of my own dear grandfather.

He suffered a stroke several years before he died and he would not let that get him down. Papa Maxwell was a strong man, lived a hard life but took care of his wife and six (ugh!) kids the best he could. He was my Mom’s Daddy and she loved him more than anyone else, probably even more than us kids if the truth be known. When he suffered his stroke it took a bit for him to get his bearings but it wasn’t long before he was up and going. He had a riding lawnmower that he rode all over his yard and property. He even rode it up and down that old country road … everyone knew to watch for him. He was not going to be that old guy who sat in a chair and died. He was tough and he kept on keeping on until he couldn’t anymore.

Eventually he asked to be Baptized. If I remember correctly, Papa Maxwell never went to church very much .. .or ever. My Granny did, every time the doors were open but I don’t think he did (my family may correct me if needed). But at this point in his life he felt the need to do the thing he knew to do. Makes me wonder if my Granny had ever nagged him about it? Stupid question I guess, she was a wife!

My theology tells me that Baptism isn’t salvation, we must make a conscious decision in our hearts to accept Christ then be born again. Then, as a sign of what has happened on the inside we are baptized as a public confession of our faith.

I never knew if anything ever happened in that order with my papa. I wouldn’t have understood any of it back then anyway and, if he had spoken, it would have been (because of his stroke he couldn’t really speak real words) a cuss word, which he did speak, not one of the big ones, only the same one over and over.

This always cracked me up. Somewhere in my crazy mind I think if I couldn’t speak but a tiny bit, a cuss word would come in handy and I would worry about etiquette later! But, I do know one thing … GOD saw his heart and HE knew what my Papa wanted to do and say in the bowing in reverence through this baptism. And I believe HE honored him in that and my Papa is there with him now.

What does that do to my so-called theology? I don’t know but I believe it anyway!

My Papa worked hard his whole life and was good to every one. He was a fair and just man, not perfect but a good man all the same. SO, when I saw this poor old man today it reminded me first to pray for him, that if he needs help someone will come to his aid. Also, to get up off my keester and make something of my self.

Truth be known, even if someone had stopped to help that old man he probably would have said NO! That’s the way old people are. They don’t make them that way anymore. I am glad that I am old enough to know folks who are that way. I am still humbled by the older generation and the fortitude and character they have. If I could relay this to my own kids I would be a happy momma!

Lord, bless that old man and all senior citizens. They have a right to be crabby — they’ve been pulling us all along for generations!

Love Birds


If my memory serves me correctly, the old classic movie, Alfred Hitchcock s, The Birds (which by the way scared the you know what out of a whole generation, including me!) was based on a joke and these two love birds that the beautiful actress, Tippi Hedron who played Melanie purchased for Mitch, who was played by the oh so dreamy Rod Taylor who, was very suave in his flirtations and the misfortune of the young ingenue turned into a frightening twist of fate…..all because she was playing a joke. I had always thought that the Love Birds were part of the problem also and the presence of them on that island caused a stir in the atmosphere. The other birds didn’t like them! I would yell at the television…..”let the birds go”!!!!!!!! Sacrifice them, set them free, then maybe the scary birds might leave.

This brings me to my point (I do usually have one even if it does take me a while to get to it!). When there are Love Birds the scary birds try to get in between them. Something about LOVE that causes the masses to gang up and peck away….peck, peck, peck….little by little because apparently being happy makes angry birds mad! BUT….the good news is….. Matthew 19:26 Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.” After thirty years of marriage (YES…..30!!!) I can say truthfully that what started as a dare from my roommate at the time (she dared me to ask that cute blonde guy out and of course I did!) has ended up a love affair that has not ended. He was the one…..!

Our life has not been without trials and the peck, peck, peck of angry birds. No one gets through this life without them. But I know that we have always put GOD first before even our own wants and HE has kept us true to one another. We married young and stupid which was a blessing and if anyone of our kids do the same thing I will lock them in a room!! I can not even think about the horror his parents must have felt at the thought of their precious only son bringing home this scraggly girl and even more asked if I could live with them for a few months before we were married. Makes my blood pressure go up at the thought of one of our kids asking that question. Lord that would be too much! But they did it and I was so smitten with this guy I was willing to follow every rule. Soon they helped us find a little house, cheap rent and a little creepy but all ours. We were married on this day April 24, 1982 on a Saturday afternoon. Happy Anniversary my sweet husband! We were on our way!

Within a year we were able to build a little house (remember the previous scripture! It was the only way!) and found out our first-born was on the way. He would be a boy and life as I knew it would be gone. I read in a book once that stated … having kids is like a tattoo on your face…… Eat, Love Pray by Elizabeth Gilbert. Well that about sizes it up, there is no getting rid of it! A life of joy when a baby arrives and of course the peck, peck, peck of evil haters! Raising children isn’t always easy….The story goes on, more children…girl, boy then nine years later boy again and many moves and life changes. But through it all, I have laughed and loved bigger than anyone I know. This man I married gave me a life of joy and peace and love as well as knowledge of a savior for which I had ever known or been taught. This man I married led me into a world better than I could ever had thought possible. I had always, my whole life wanted to live in New York, NY but I can after 30 years say I haven’t missed a thing!

If he sticks with me for another 30 plus I look forward to even more love and fun and passion and he still is the man of my dreams. We are two LOVE BIRDS that are loving life in our cage, protected from all the angry birds out there. We have probably broken a few records, I know there were people who sat in the church and watched us marry who felt confident we wouldn’t make it and to be honest…who knew we would? I know I was determined to go longer than my own parents and back to that scripture again…HE was on our side! So for anyone who has hopes of marriage and the chance of it lasting….look up. It can and will be the most fun, aggravating, frustrating, laughable, scary, meaningful decision you may ever make. I am not sure if we had counted the costs and really planned so much if we would have either one followed through with it, we just went with our hearts and I knew I had found a keeper!

I am thankful for him and his life lived before me and our children as a testimony of faith and he still makes me blush my heart leap. No one ever loved me the way he does and I him and forever will I be thankful for the life we have had.

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“falling” for Jesus!


Sometimes I wonder, when I get myself in theses situations what is the deal? I try to live a good life, not just good but a life given to Christ, HE is my Hope! So when I am given an opportunity to experience GOD through a worship service with an awesome praise team….Jesus Culturehttp://youtu.be/JoC1ec-lYps ( jesusculture.com)… I am honored. But in my own distinct way….yes, wait for it….”falling for Jesus” takes on a whole new meaning!
Yep, there I go….literally tripping down the first step into the arena!…The CURB Center at Belmont University, Nashville, TN…….SPLAT!!!! “falling” on my face, BAM right against the hand rail my face, big bump starts to grow immediately, for which I missed holding ….rolling my left ankle, CRUNCH….AAAWWWEEE! of course the next few minutes of hoping against hope nobody noticed!! No such luck! My poor friend was so scared for me, I hate that and even more ruining the evening and then a person who works there and a couple of nice men to help forklift me up! UGH! Really need to work on that diet!
Could I embarrass myself more! Yes I am vain enough to think of the embarrassment more than the fact I nearly died of blunt force trauma to the head wounds! Dying would have been a plus at this point…kill me now, Lord! But no, I recover, get my big self up, shake off, swear I am fine and as best as I can look like I am not in awful pain I hobble down to my seat where a few of my friends are watching in shock.
Yep that was me who face planted up there! Oh no I am fine…..”only a flesh wound!” (holy grail reference, btw) but as I sat the more I hurt. Then the medic comes …..ugh! Everyone staring….ok just so we got this straight, If I am entertaining a crowd in some funny way with my obvious Wit then I love it…look on, love me! But when I am in this compromising situation all vulnerable …eeek!
The EMT guy was very sweet, he knew I was embarrassed ….looked at my head, my foot, gave me a ice pack, took my BP, through the roof of course! Offered me transport to hospital, I decline( later I thought I may should have gone as my pain worsened and I have never gotten to ride in an ambulance!) “please sign this release ma’am”, translation ….so I don’t sue them( not their fault I am a klutz !).
Finally he left, stop blocking the isles, I could chill. The sweet young guy in front of me asked if I was gonna live, offered to pray for me, which was soooo sweet and cute, he did ( we were in a room full of Christians, glad somebody thought of it!) and then the music started. Everyone stood nearly the whole time!!!! I attempted to show a good front, stood up too.. …ok not for long, reminding myself I believe in healing, began to convince myself of that fact.
I enjoyed the view from my perspective, a sea of worshippers….beautiful! I found a ridiculous way to “fall” for Jesus but I got to watch thousands of people, primarily 20 to 30 year olds falling too! Sometimes worship can be a spectator sport, not my first choice but good all the same. Gives one hope to see people still hungry for God.
Now I know why I am an indoor person, it’s not safe out there!
http://www.jesusculture.com/events

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Easter Eve


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Sometimes ya gotta just jump out there and make it clear where ya stand…like it or not!

I believe in GOD and his Son JESUS and I try to live my life as a reflection of HIM. Living a Christian life is a road less travelled and the only road.

On this Easter Eve….I pray any person who reads my words will take a moment to pause on eternity. Choose life not death!

There are options!

In love.

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Easter Eve


20120407-225910.jpg
Sometimes ya gotta just jump out there and make it clear where ya stand…like it or not!

I believe in GOD and his Son JESUS and I try to live my life as a reflection of HIM. Living a Christian life is a road less travelled and the only road.

On this Easter Eve….I pray any person who reads my words will take a moment to pause on eternity. Choose life not death!

There are options!

In love.

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MOM or 666!


My darling daughter let me in on her private (not so much any more) secret that makes her giggle every time she calls me on her cell phone. I must say it is pretty funny although it does involve mean and cruel jokes at my expense. It appears that on her phone she can type the word MOM and the numbers that show up are 666!

“NO WAY!!!” I respond but, to my dismay it is true! Kinda makes you wonder about, way back when Alexander Graham Bell was toying with this new fangled idea of a way to communicate…the Telephone, he possibly…”accidentally”….. “on purpose”… worked it out that the “O” and “M” letters would be on the same key and end up with the dreaded sign of the ANTICHRIST! He could have quite easily had “M and N” on a number and let “O” dangle over there with “P”...I mean he was the one designing the darn thing!

Could it have been that the memories of his own sainted mother rang out in a nagging voice, during this time of inspiration and invention, reminding him of all the late night sessions of creativity of his godly mother (telling him to turn the light off and go to bed!)….who only loves her son Alex and wants him to get a good nights sleep and eat well and do good in school and meet a nice girl and settle down and…and…and….all those things mothers for centuries have wanted for their children…could it be that he might have possibly jumbled those letters up all on one number, just to have his own private joke?I shutter to think it and at the same time I would be so proud of him!

Or was this just the luck of the draw and became a treat for all those kids who just now and then need a laugh? Odds are good that is the case but it is comforting, as a mother, that my kids are overjoyed when they type my name in their phone and be reminded…..”don’t mess with ME….I am dangerous!!!” Children have really so little true power, ultimately we do hold the keys to the kingdom and it is little comfort to them to once in a while they get to …”stick it to the MAN!”…or MOM in this case.

It has not been that long ago (well, I am lying it has, go with me here!) that I was one of those kids and I too would have liked to get my mom once in a while. I seem to remember a dread full pleated skirt that I thought made be look huge…I was like 4’11” and weighed probably all of 98lbs….yep I was soooo huge! Makes me gag thinking how skinny I once was! But to me, then..those pleats all the way around that ugly skirt were awful! and I NEVER WORE THE SKIRT!…never even had the tags off, hung in my closet till it eventually disappeared. Send it to the poor girls around the world that “would love to have a nice ugly skirt”….but I did hear about it over and over…blah, blah,blah!

But because ..what goes around comes around, I too have my wars with my precious God sent angel face little girl and I think it probably was over an outfit. Funny how I have so little memories of those arguments with my own daughter…hmm, selective memory I would guess! The last time I mentioned that atrocious skirt of mine to my MOM she rolled her eyes and had no memories of it either….ouch, I feel ya Momma!

The great thing about this funny quip is that we all dial that MOM number a lot….and the coincidence is just that and I hope that my girl never stops. Just don’t fret I am a writer ya know! I have my ways to retaliate!!

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GRACE


What is GRACE?

It is something I can not earn, I have no possibilities of containing or holding or even controlling, hence my fears. It is not a commodity but a gift.

Maybe I am the only one who has difficulty with gifts? I love to give them but it is hard to receive them! Is it false humility or real humility or what?

I have come to the conclusion it is a born-in-us feeling of unworthiness. As if, I haven’t earned it so why would anyone give me a gift? It is a skill to learn, to be a receiver of gifts. I still have a hard time with it but after many “awe shucks, you shouldn’t haves …” I am able to at least graciously accept it. It is rude to not, actually, and it is offensive to the giver.

The giver is a candidate for a blessing, that is what the Bible says — give and it shall be given to you, pressed down and running over (paraphrased). That sounds to me like it is pretty good. I can always take some running over of blessings.

In our life we have been receivers of many great blessings. We have been blessed to know many great people who have loved us unconditionally and have helped to make our lives a bit easier. Many times I have guilt because I feel like I want to be the giver — more. But one precious woman told me one day, “your family does give, everyday with your service.” In a way she kinda rebuked me but in kindness. She wanted me to know we were important and not to sell ourselves short. What we do does make a difference!

AHHH GRACE!

This life we have been called to live is an important one. Most days I feel less than worthy to even claim I am a follower of Christ. Bad press for Jesus I think and that he doesn’t need the headache of me dragging along taking up space. But NO, he loves me and allows me to stand for HIM in every day of my life.He is a big GOD and he can take even my worst days. It is all about HIM and making sure I don’t come to the end of my life without the knowledge that I have shown someone the way to truth.

Argue all you want — don’t knock it till you’ve tried it!

First page of the Gospel of Mark, by Sargis Pi...

People are lined up saying the Bible is just a nice book written by men, mortal men (emphasis on men (not women)) but you show me someone who says that and I would bet that they have never read it in full! That is one thing I would wager to say is truth!

It is alive with a theme that runs from the table of contents to the maps — God is real, God is LOVE, Jesus is HIS SON, and salvation is through Jesus.

We can put whatever denominational name we want on GOD. It is all rubbish. I could care less if someone is a “kind” of Christian denomination. What I care about is, do you follow Jesus? Have you given HIM your whole heart? Do you make decisions based on your walk with the Lord?

The only way to do this is through GRACE.

I am unable to be a good person and I have proved that. Only through the GRACE of GOD can I be what HE has for me to be. And that is all I ever want.

Okay finished with my rant!

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TOO SWEET


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A beautiful sign of spring is the blooming of apple trees. I have never seen the blooming trees in Washington, D.C. (in person) but I would guess it is a sight to see. I will have to settle for the blooming apple trees at The Apple Barn in Pigeon Forge, TN.

This quaint but impressive orchard has been a family favorite with the “world of all things apple” — apple pie, caramel apples, apple cider, plus a candy kitchen with tons of different kinds, including: dark chocolate almond clusters (my personal favorite) and taffy (my daughters one-and-only want, peppermint!) so need I say more — apple Mecca!

candied apple

Our visit today was short, our usual on the way out-of-town stop. We never go back home without our treats for the kids. No matter how old they get, it is still expected. But we spoiled them with that one! As a parent, it is comforting to know they still want that small treat. My boys love caramel apples the most, nuts and without or both, they are happy and easy to please.

As time ticks away the kids get older, mature, finally begin to show signs of what awesome people are to come. I knew they would tun out winners. We raised them right, no matter what propaganda they have tried to fabricate! It is their job to try every way in the world to defy us. Kids will be kids ya know. But I see the edge of the rainbow. I see a glimpse of what is to come and it is so much fun!

Just as the apple blossoms return every year, kids eventually get a clue, begin to evolve into the people we know they can be.
Whew!!!

Thanks Lord for allowing me to see the day it happens. Too sweet. Sweet as apple pie!

All me….


I am a writer. Yep, I said it. I am taking charge of it, owning it. I am a writer!

I don’t know if anyone wants to be a reader but I still will write. I have another blog also. I wanted to branch out a bit to let my freak out flag fly.

I used to believe all the press that was out there about being a mom … blah, blah, blah! Come visit me in the trenches and I will show you my heart cut open in a gazillion pieces. That is what being a mom is all about!

Of course it has its good days. Someone tell me when they will be. Okay, I know I am sounding pretty down in the dumps about it. Some days yes and some days no. It is what it is. About ME.

I am old and getting gray and overweight and unemployed and still I see hope. Go figure that! I am creative but only selectively, when I get in the mood and all the conditions are right, stars aligned etc, etc. I have a very southern accent, which even my southern kids get frustrated with. Oh well, I would be a failure if they thought I was cool I guess.

I am the wife of one husband and he is my best friend in this world even though I am sure he would question if I even like him most days … more on that later. I am a good friend in a world of friendlessness. It is hard on these mean streets to find a good friend. More on that later too!

I like to paint and read and make collages and doodle and sew all of which I do not do enough. Writing has captured my mind these days.

Ahhhh Grace!