Category Archives: LIFE

Cousins and such…

Christianity, enjoyment, encouragement, Family, Friends, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

WEDNESDAY, NOVEMBER 24, 2010

Cousins and such!

There is nothing like spending time with family during the holidays. Everyone is on their good behavior and using all the social graces that they can muster up to “get along” with everyone. I am not saying this isn’t a good idea, mind you, but it is during this time that I am most aware of the special bond we all have and that even though we all have aged, grown up and I am afraid, out(or maybe that’s just me!)it seems that we are all still the same. I am not sure if it is this way in all families but when I am around my siblings, I am still the youngest. Obviously I am because of my birth order, but I am also the youngest in the “pecking order”! This is not always a bad thing, I am still the one they all kinda still like, I was the one they all looked after and petted and loved on. And even though they all had to look after me, I still feel their love in so many ways which is surprising considering I was(still am) a bit spoiled. It is their fault, I say! I was a willing victim and will always revel in the security and honor of my position. Even though we are all adults, my Brother is still the Big Boss, Oldest Sis is still next boss in waiting, next Sis is the calm one and then there is me…well the perfect one! When we move to our extended family we have all the Aunts and Uncles. There is another dynamic going on with them that our parents have to deal with, leftover wars and sweet alliances but to me they are better than ever parents. They are the parents we wish we had, the parents that seem from the outside looking in to be the ones that we should have had. We love our own parents of course but these people are so sweet to us and live so much more exciting lives and their kids never got in to trouble like we did, or that is the way it seemed to us. Each one of my Aunts and Uncles hold a special memory and place in my heart and I could never thank them enough for the encouragement and kindness they have shown me. The last awesome family group is the cousins. They are the most special because they aren’t my siblings, they are siblings with special gifts and powers. They aren’t usually grouchy like your brothers and sisters, they are more fun and since you don’t get to see them as often, they can be the closest of confidants as well as the greatest master minds. For some reason you feel the ability to get away with so much more with the cousins. I have many memories of holidays when all the cousins were there at the grandparents home and the football games, the older ones would never let us “little” kids play, never fair but we just abide by the rules because they were the bosses, don’t ya know! I usually had an ongoing crush on most of my boy cousins, mostly because they were my pals since I was a tomboy but a little because they were so dang cute. Okay, when you are nine years old it’s not creepy, a crush is just that, the only way to explain how much you love those tough boys that let you hang out with them…sometimes and then when you grow up you realize how fun it is to sit at a Thanksgiving table with them all and listen to their stories, it never gets old to me and it is a memory I will carry with me always. These cousins are the best because the during this family dynamic there is just enough time to have fun without the possibility to have very many knock-down-drag-out fights that we siblings often do. They are siblings with a twist of gumdrops! I would comfortably say that I am blessed to have cousins that have encouraged me and loved me and the short time we are able to spend together is full of laughs and love that I will always cherish. I still have that crush on all of them and think of them fondly and look forward to tomorrow when we all get together and do it all over again…Happy Thanksgiving..ya’ll and the ones that we won’t see, you are in our hearts and prayers, but come home soon..please!

Out with the old

Christianity, enjoyment, encouragement, Family, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

TUESDAY, DECEMBER 28, 2010

Out with the Old…

Waiting out the end of the year while looking forward to what is to come in the new one is a normal part of each of our lives, for some reason it feels as if it has come sooner this year than in the past years, it still seems daunting. The past year went by in a flash and it doesn’t seem possible that it is almost over. Our family Christmas was special last year, our precious time together was highlighted with the loving thoughtfulness of my youngest son, he is the king of poignant cards, they made us laugh and cry all at the same time, we took note of the times that year that were hard and seemed as if they would never end, that Christmas we were all together, for maybe the last time. This year meandered along like a slow-moving locomotive, never really building up much steam, uneventful in many ways but there were days that were in seemingly slow motion and we hoped they would end and never replay, but as our life usually plays out we have more groundhog days than any family should have. These are the times in our lives when I just wish we could get a new log to trip over instead of the same old one. But on the bright side we have had some good days, seeing my son play his guitar in church again, will go down in history as my best day this year, I am sure there have been other good days, but with drama of children and starting a new job, enduring our beloved Nashville covered in flood waters and then losing a job, this has been a year of many ups and downs, so it is easy to say, I am done with it, on to better days and hopefully this will be the year that our direction will be made clear. I sense the need to get my bearings, to find a map, get on the right path and listen intently to what the Lord is saying. My fear is He isn’t saying or even worse, I am not listening. Time to shut it down, turn everything off, get alone and seek til I find. If I could be bold enough to ask for something this year..a clear direction. Time to take stock, time to clear the deck, feeling the need for some de-cluttering, unload the things that are pulling me down, ouch I am feeling that lose weight conviction too! Well I might as well get it all out at one time. I feel the need to look at anything that comes into my life and path that if it is not of virtue or is harmful in some way to my mind, body or spirit, I should count the cost. Lord help me along this journey, I am already getting worried…I believe, help my unbelief!

About ME

art, Christianity, enjoyment, encouragement, Family, GOD, LIFE

I am a wife and a preacherswife and mother of 4 and I love my family. We moved back to my hometown near Nashville, TN and I am loving my life. I love writing, art…painting, creating something new from something old and I love God. I really wish people could lighten up and realize that God does love us and He cares what happens to us. A great man once said………..”believe Jesus and mind him!” That about says it all. Harder than it looks too…….Faith is the word! He has it all under control. Sometimes He whispers and sometimes he yells, I am just trying to learn what I need to after the whisper! I have journal ed over the years and I have always used this as a sort of therapy. My vision for this NEW way of journaling is to possibly help someone else who may be struggling with some of the same issues I am as well as for the pure joy of sharing my ups and downs. Moving back to my hometown area has been an adjustment…I have tended to re live some of my past, the good times and the bad. Memories make for interesting days and I tend to use those for writing, who needs a psychologist huh? I have no complaints…I am a blessed person, I have lived what feels like many lives and I am thrilled at the thought of the days to come. As a pastor’s wife my roll is more of a friend to our church family, we are not a two-headed monster…..HE is the pastor. I prefer to be involved with the ministry of hospitality and helps, women and of course the kiddos. I was raised on a farm the first ten years of my life and then after my parents divorce we moved to the town…..to my dismay! I eventually got over the shock and did ok…still always feeling like the odd man out but I survived. I always wanted to be an artist….my passion over all my school years. I have always loved every or any aspect of anything artsy! This is one venue for me to create with words. For anyone who reads…thank you for coming along!

…….and this is my sweet dog, Buddy! For which he is the best one ever!

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I am Loved

Christianity, Family, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

MONDAY, JANUARY 3, 2011

I am loved!

I know it is only January but, I am encouraged by the new year…I have no real reason that I can claim why the feeling of hope but I just have that presence of mind that this will be a good year. Maybe because it is the beginning or because I am always excited about all things new. So much so I like to keep things new. I almost think that had I been born in the generation before me I would have been that one who kept the plastic on the lamp shade and the furniture. There is something about it all still being new, not all covered in cat hair or dust(mites), glad I can’t see those, creeps me out just knowing they are there. I am not the person who should watch the Discovery programs on all the creepy stuff that happens during the night while we gently sleep. The layers of skin and mites and spiders that crawl in our mouth…..shhhhhhh! I need to stop talking about it even now! I am the one who hates to write the first page of a new notebook or paint on the clean white canvas or wear a new white shirt because I know the minute I put it on it will get a smudge, I will flick mascara on it, which only mushes and will not come out no matter how much I try, then I have to find another one to wear..it is an endless cycle! So when “things” are new it causes my OCD (never officially been diagnosed, but I am sure I have it) to kick into high gear and then my procrastination sets in and I am back at square one again. But today with the start of a new year I feel strong and hopeful and encouraged, but I don’t know why, just a feeling. I haven’t made any public resolutions, I do have some between me and God, can’t say them out loud..the Devil will hear them! I know that God will keep them on the down-low though, He is cool like that and I know He will carry me through these days when I am not so sure… I can do all things through Him who strengthens me! I am a “glass half full” girl and I need to remind myself that every day. I always have a 50/50 chance of being right. I am blessed, I have a husband that has ALWAYS loved me, I have never wondered about that, and he is the funniest person I have ever known and even if we were not together anymore, I would have to be his best friend because I would miss him so much, he is that cool, he is my best friend and we have been in the foxholes together and survived it and I attribute all of my sanity and ability to maintain this 28 year relationship all to him…as he has followed the Lord. We have not always been perfect as parents or people, believe me I can be a pill! He has given me the grace to be the real me and put up with all my psychosis and yet hung in there loving me all the same. We are entering into the good years I believe and I can only hope a beach house is involved…it could happen!. I am also blessed because I have a big ole batch of kids who someday when they all find their paths the Lord has designed for them, they will come home and visit and love on us and be the people who I know they can be…I have seen the future and it is bright for them, all of them, they are my best friends, each unique and all of them as funny and quick-witted as their daddy, they are well read and smart and sharp-tongued like me, sorry world! Look out though, they are a force to be reckoned with and I am more proud of them than any parent should be. I am also blessed because I am a sister with sisters who keep me in line and who were the first ones to encourage and look after me, girls are tough, lets just be honest, but they taught me how to be a girl who is a friend and because of that I have a few great friends who love me unconditionally, fat or skinny, mad or sad, doing right or bad attitude, they are there for me, you girls rock and I am thrilled you have chosen me. So of course I am hopeful about the new year, what have I got to lose, I am not any richer or skinnier or younger but I am loved…that’s all I need!…except this lamp and this phonebook…that’s all I need!

Old Friends

Christianity, enjoyment, encouragement, Friends, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE

TUESDAY, MARCH 22, 2011

Old Friends

Through this crazy thing called social networking I have recently been able to re- connect with some old friends. Old because they were the people from my childhood, not old as in OLD! Well, this is my blog so I can spin that any way I want! So with this new fangled way of communication it is refreshing to “talk” to these people who knew me back then. I am using the word talk loosely; talking via email or chat is good but it is hard to hear the persons tone or inflections in their voice, things which are the parts of the conversation that make it more fun to talk. So after of this frustration I finally was able to speak, voice to voice with one of my dearest “old” friends. She is a person who helped me at a time in my life when I felt all alone. She asked her mom if I could move in with them in her family home and now that I am a mom of four I am so moved at the ability of this mom to take me in. WoW! is all I can say. Her mom was a brave soul and my friend was too. You take on so much possible drama; how brave they were. Of course…I was very sweet and angelic and there was not any drama….pleez! My friend and I talked and talked, with so much excitement, we could hardly keep from talking over each other on the phone, both with our stories to tell, both wanting to say all the stuff we had not had the time to say. Makes me ask the question…? Why did we not stay in touch? What was more important than keeping up our relationship? LIFE got the best of us…she got married to a great guy, for which she reminded me I introduced her to, apparently I liked him first, or at least thought he had potential…until he saw her. BAM! He was smitten! I never blamed him, she is a doll and I was glad for them both, I had just forgotten that fact, she reminded me. That is the fun part of actually talking…..you are able to hear the excitement, hear the heart of the other person, feel their pain as well as their joy. When she answered the phone and said….”Rosie”, I knew I was home. Not many people get away with calling me that. My sisters are nearly the only ones, maybe my cousins but not friends of my old age. Her voice was a sight for sore ears, I needed that hug over the phone. I needed that memory of a friend that knew me before the world got the best of me….I needed my friend. Life has been as good and bad for her as it has me, same stories, differently players. But in that moment on that phone we were nineteen again, driving to Daytona Beach on spring break….in a VW bug, singing Silly Love Songs, via Paul McCartney and having the time of our lives. While reminiscing with my friend about our past lives….I was taken aback by the similarity of my fun life and the lives of my own children. It becomes the old saying about walking a day in my shoes story….it is as hard for them to find their own way in the world as it was for me. As a mom, that is good for me to see. I only wish as adult children they could take advantage of my wisdom…I have been there and done that..in spades! But, they have to learn it the hard way, just like I did. Life is a circle that can’t be broken and I am thankful to have had people in my life to help me along the way..old friends are the best friends, she was and still is a doll and my life is more rich because of her. Old or new they are the iron that sharpens iron, which cause us to be better people ourselves. I am satisfied in the memories of the people who have loved me, I have had it the best and I am thankful and humbled…thanks ya’ll.

Baby Girl

Christianity, enjoyment, encouragement, Family, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

FRIDAY, AUGUST 12, 2011

Baby Girl!

After twenty-five years of raising a girl, I would have to say that boys are easier! This is my conclusion because I have raised three boys…or nearly got them raised! Do boys ever really grow up? This is not to be said in any way to slight my daughter or to seem as if it hasn’t been a joyous adventure, it has been. But, only to say that it has surely been an adventure! Along about the time my beautiful blond, blue-eyed first-born was nearly one and a half I got the feeling I was ready for another baby…yes, I think I did drink the kool-aide! Crazy as it seemed to probably everyone, I wanted another and not only another child but a GIRL! It took me a little while to accomplish this, a lot of practice…over and over but finally after six months the rabbit died and we had ourselves a baby. This baby in fact is the one I prayed for, made a special request to God, picked her out especially…blond, blue eyes(that was a given, her brother came out that way..ha)A GIRL!, (fifty-fifty chance!) and not just a girl but a spunky, feisty, tomboy, but frilly still, girlie girl! I wanted her to be well….like me I guess! OOPS…what was I thinking? I knew I was having a girl, I painted the room white and pink…had pretty wallpaper with pink flowers, before I had a test done to be for sure..I just knew! I had picked out her name long before we had our first…Bethany, the city of Mary and Martha and when I first heard it I knew I loved it, I had not known of any other girls named that, it was unique..special, only I wanted Esther as her middle name but after NO BODY BUT ME WANTED IT, except for Charles, we loved that book in the Bible so much….I bent under a public outcry (wimp!) I went with the only vain choice..Rose. She now thanks me for not sticking her with ESTHER! So here we go, God does answer our prayers, hardly gained any weight, 13 pounds! she was a lot smaller than Will but perfect in every way…we were so blessed and I couldn’t contain my joy. We all three were so happy, our family was perfect, one boy….one girl…all were healthy. She was beautiful..her skin was like light pink velvet…I was smitten with this little thing. The funny thing was that about two months old she began to be colic ridden…and all that goes with that! She wouldn’t take a pacci..ugh! and when she was asleep…she wasn’t. Dear sweet daddy was the only one who could get her asleep but she still had one eye open..ha This one didn’t want to miss a thing and she didn’t. When she was four months old we found out our joy would be made even more full…I WAS PREGNANT AGAIN! so thirteen months after she was born we had Samuel. So then she decided she wanted HIS PACI! Only to put it in her mouth upside down where it stayed for the rest of the time. There begins the trials and tribulations of raising a girl. They have that precious and so sappy sweet way of getting what they want. If it doesn’t come from asking sweetly they will get it any way possible! This short time we have had this unique, special little girl has been nothing short of joy unspeakable with a mix of feisty ness and a chaser of screaming at the top of her lungs. The real truth of the matter is that it is probably all my fault…I prayed for her, picked her out special and God loves me enough to give me just what I ask for…another helping of ME! He is funny that way…you know HE is laughing the whole time. If I were HIM I would do the same thing. “Hush up lady…I got all these problems in the world to fix and your there whining about a thing that is gonna be, regardless of what you say..I got this…it’s in the genes”. He got all this figured out way back when. I have to say that I wouldn’t change one thing about her….she is the only girl in the midst of three boys and she could beat all of them up, she could rule and reign over all three of them and has at different times, she gets her way, nearly every time and she is smarter than all of us put together. I just hope she never figures that one out…Girls are pretty special…I am glad I had one (only one!) and I am a better woman because I had the honor of raising my little girl. At twenty-five years old today, Bethany, welcome to the rest of your life….the world is at your feet, YOU ARE STRONG AND BEAUTIFUL AND SMART AND GOD LOVES YOU EXTRA SPECIAL! THIS IS YOUR TIME TO TAKE YOUR PLACE IN THE WORLD! Look out world…here she comes! Happy Birthday Bethany Rose…I love you, Mom.

Two for the price of one

Christianity, enjoyment, encouragement, Family, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

WEDNESDAY, SEPTEMBER 21, 2011

Two for the price of one!

As I look back on the past years I am reminded of the awesome miracles that I have been given, today especially since on this day twenty four years ago and also fifteen years ago, respectively, I was given two amazing opportunities to see Gods hand at work in two beautiful ways. It has been said that there is nothing more precious than the smile of your own precious baby and I would have to say that there are never more true words. The first one of the September 21st babies was not without incident…not his fault at all, but he came on the literal heels of his loud and proud older sister…well only thirteen months older! Yes kids, mom and dad got busy and we are pleased to announce the birth of our second son..what! Yep that is the response we got…people were mortified, no, shocked, no, loud mouthed and rude about it would better describe it!! How odd that two normal, loving, christian, healthy people would have the nerve to have yet another child only thirteen months after the second one. Oh, I forgot we were suppose to stop at two, we must have not realized the rules. Well, we were young and stupid and happy and in love. How dare we! Needless to say I may have a little bit of an axe to grind, still…writing is therapy ya know! As it turned out, God is good, this new baby came and we couldn’t be happier. He is beautiful and the best baby in the universe. I SAY THAT SERIOUSLY..he was calm and sweet and there were times I would have to look to see if he was ok, he was so good, a juxtaposition from that older sister afore mentioned. This little one looked like my side of the family…I was thrilled, he had the same skin as my daddy, darker hair at birth than the others but soon turned lighter and he was a puddin’ of a child. I was in love again…and all those nay sayers can just talk to themselves, my little lefty (his Aunt Ramona’s fault, btw) has been a joy to love. He has been the calm in the storm and I see me in him and even more my sister Jan(she was the third child too and they are very similar), his eyes are big and dreamy and I am blessed to be his mom. This man now is a comfort and keeps me on my toes, being an avid reader and too smart for my own good, I see greatness in his future. This brings me to the TWO for the price of one part. Zip ahead nine years and to repeat the shock and awe that was so powerful just a few years back we are expecting another bundle of joy! I don’t want to presume to think that anyone including me would think that this comes as a surprise, although I wasn’t really trying to get pregnant BUT I was kinda wanting to. That is the truth, I felt like I had one more to have, I knew it would be a girl and then it would be perfect! Two boys, two girls, everyone would be perfect and beautiful (we do make pretty kids, she says humbly) and with presumption I went, not worrying about a thing…till the day I found out I wasnt just sick…I was with child. I kinda freaked out for about five minutes until my beloved said the kindest words he could ever say to me…” Don’t worry, this is what you do best, being a mommy” and at that moment I was at peace. Needles to say I have failed many times in that department, crashed and burned even, but I sure do love it. Then, after we gave this little one a girl name only to find out HE is a boy! then a momentary fear of something happening within the womb that he could be born without some limbs for which GOD IS GOOD and he came into this world perfect without any difficulties. This little guy was loved to the max before he ever got here….once our ten year old girl welcomed the fact she wasn’t getting a little sister ( Dodged a bullet there, by the way..what was I thinking, ONE GIRL IS PLENTY! How do you spell drama?) Our beautiful boy was born on the exact same day as his brother, only nine years later…Two on the same birthday! As a side note here: also the Saturday UT VOLS played Florida..GO VOLS! After attempting to make Sam believe that he got the ultimate birthday present…a baby brother (NOT) we all rallied around this kid. No one child had more people to wait on him hand and foot. But he sure was sweet, like his birthday mate, easy and sweet and calm and we all loved him so much. I was finally finished having babies, all tied up and complete, I felt now for sure our nest was full, Daddy was loving this kid, we were older and more experienced and this was a piece of cake. Bethany got a real life baby doll to play with and the boys had someone to show how to be a man. We had a blast, it was never a chore and we all loved to love him, this little boy with the big name, Nathanael Joseph, for which I shortened to NJ one day on a whim which stuck. This boy has been a blessing from the start, I know that God gave him especially to me, to keep me going. He has been my own personal life mirror, he is real and honest and confronts my humanity at every point. He has kept me sane (well that could be questioned) but I feel like he keeps me grounded. I like this kid, he is as funny as his dad and as happy a kid as you would ever meet. He brightens my day and has a song in his heart constantly. He loves God and never meets a stranger, welcomes his friends to his world without question. Our family is richer for having him, we all have had a part in raising him, he is the best of us all. Happy Birthday my two for the price of one children….no mother could be more proud of her boys and I can not wait to see what the Lord has for you two in your days ahead. Just don’t forget to take care of me and your dad!

“My pigtails are too tight!”

Cancer, Christianity, Family, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

Today I had a funny thing said to me while in a conversation with my sister-in-law on the phone and it cracked me up so much as our talks usually do and sent my mind reeling to the point that it made me think long and hard about life and the frailty of it. She was telling me about a recent surgery and she had gone back to the doctor for the stitch removal from the back of her neck. Now as a rule these stories of medical adventures are not something that I take joy in hearing about from most people. It isn’t that I am particularly heartless or uncaring, (although I have been told that Mercy is not one of my strong spiritual gifts) it is just that I get a bit creeped out by all the messy details, but I attempt to listen intently and nod in concern at the proper times. On this day I was paying close attention because my dear sister is dealing with an awfully frightening battle, one that I am prayerfully hopeful will be a conquest for the Lord which will reveal his mercy and healing power, so I am astutely interested in all the details, she is my husbands only sibling and has been one of my closest friends for the last 28 years. We have raised our kids together, been through ups and downs as families go, day to day crisis, jealousies and frustrations, good times and bad. We have had many times of rejoicing, we have been in ministry together (I secretly prayed for her ability to cry every time she walked into church, seems so caring!}, encouraging each other and telling each other the plain truth on most occasions. It has not always been pretty but, it has always been fun, we have laughed about all the ridiculous stages of our lives(this one being funny, thank goodness for cell phones in compromising situations), kept each others kids, stayed snowed in playing cards all day with our men and taken our family vacations to the beach. We haven’t always agreed but we have always eventually been able to talk it out and remain friends. We know more dirt on each other than anyone else, it’s in the vault and will remain until Jesus comes..we are buddies, com padres, friends and freinemies! To sum it up…sisters, she was there when I was missing my two sisters, I was her only one, even though only by marriage, she was with me in the delivery room with my third child, she made him a southpaw…I am convinced of that, needless to say… we are tight. So when she said that her stitches were so tight before the doctor took them out that “it felt like her pigtails were too tight!” it totally cracked me up. The visual was killing me and if you have ever had that problem, i.e. pigtails too tight, you can completely empathize with her. It took me straight back to when I was a little girl with pigtails and the awful pain, one that hurt your head all day long and it finally dawns on you after the headache that won’t go away, that it is the pigtails that are causing it. Then you have the decision to make…do you endure it or take down your hair and deal with the awful humps in your hair from the rubber bands? So you leave it up till you get to the safety of home and that is why it was such a funny thing to say..it was so childlike, so naturally plain and real. It was a remembrance that made me feel happy. Happy is what I want to be when talking to her about her situation, a hard one to stomach, yet she has handled it with all the grace and courage that I would expect from her. This is typical of her, strong yet frail on the inside, she will maintain this attitude of gratitude for her family and her Lord. She has much faith and she is a force to be reckoned with so good luck Devil! You’ll not win! Her precious grandfather who passed away a few years ago at just short of 100 years old, who by the way was just about the most quick witted person ever born, would often say…”bring me my flowers while I am still alive!” So to my precious sister, not just in-law but for real, here are your flowers, you are important, you are a valuable prayer warrior in God’s army and and a friend of great heart and love. The times we have laughed and they have been many will be some of my most sacred memories and when the day comes that we actually figure out how to be committed to our adjoining rubber rooms in the insane asylum, I know we will have many more, three square meals a day and all the rook playing we want. And eventually, which ever one of us that makes it to heaven first, be sure to find out where the best bathroom is! We have covered most of Tennessee, Alabama and the Gulf, that will be a new frontier for us. Seriously, we must always be prepared for anything! AHHH, middle age….ain’t it grand!

New York, New York

enjoyment, encouragement, Family, GOD, humor, hope, LIFE, love

Today I had a very pleasant visit with my precious mother. She lives with my older sister, for which I am very grateful. My sister has taken the daunting task of “looking after” our mother of 82 years young and it is, I am sure a blessing and at times a frustration. Not to say it would be hard for my sis, she loves her with her whole heart, but anytime you have the full responsibility of anyone it can be a bit much, but she does this with great joy and love for our mom and our family is blessed to have our mom in a safe and loving place. For this I will always honor my sister for the sacrifice she has made. While visiting with my mom, whom of which I respect more than she could ever know, she was telling me of a time long ago when I was around 5 or 6 years old. Now needless to say, she like me can’t tell you where she laid her glasses last, but can remember the past joys and sorrows as if they happened within the past hour. Odd how that happens and I am already right there with her. We were talking about growing up with hopes and dreams for the future and I was relating to her how it seems odd to me that kids these days are many times without any goals or plans for their future. We debated it back and forth and we realized it is because kids of this generation or for the past 20 years or so have not had to struggle so much. We like most parents have tried to give our children everything they needed as well a wanted. I grew up not as poor as my Mom, but without a lot of the more modern doo dads of the day, hand-me-downs and such and I think I am the better for it. It gave me a strong work ethic and the strength to work for what I wanted as I got older. My mom grew up very poor, in a town that the main employment was a Limestone factory, Sherwood, TN, which is on the Alabama side of Monteagle Mountain. When the Limestone factory left, all the work left and men had to travel to cities close by (close meaning up a mountain and down the other side usually!)Her goal was to someday leave that tiny town and become something amazing, maybe a nurse? Well as fate would have it, she married a handsome man who joined the Army and took her to Germany, eventually, had 5 children total and ended up on a farm way out in Readyville, TN. Well, probably not the excitement she was looking for as a young girl but it was something. I am pretty glad, that is how I got here and I am lucky to have a great mom. She did have aspirations and her adventurous spirit came in handy after many years of marriage and the eventual time, after my dad left us, of just her and us kids, and later on she was able to take a trip to Fairbanks, Alaska to visit my older brother and his beautiful family, who was in the Army. From that trip she stayed and went to work on the North Slope, the gas pipeline and stayed for 9 years. My mom has lived her life renewing it over and over, never scared of the next chapter(or she never showed she was), forging ahead for a new adventure. During our conversation about the kids these days she proceeded to tell me a little story about myself. She stated that when I was home one day with her, which wasn’t the norm because I most days stayed with my Granny Maxwell, while she worked and my siblings were at school. But on this day she was home with me and she said I had an old handbag that my precious granny had given me and I was sitting on the step down into our kitchen in our old farm house. She said I was playing with the purse and talking up a storm (no!) and stated matter of factly that …Mamma, someday I am going to take my new purse and be an artist and go to New York City! I almost cracked up and said, why did I say that, did she know? She said it was because every afternoon of my young life, while at my Granny’s house, after lunch everything in our world stopped, and we would sit in the living room and watch her stories. Stories are Soap Operas and in the south we called them Stories! She said that the Stories were were all from New York City and I had always wanted to go there. What a revelation to me….I did not remember that, I did remember the handbag, it was black leathery and one of those claspy button closures on top for which I would usually pinch my finger every time, with one short handle, old school, old lady bag that always smelled like Juicy Fruit gum on the inside. The funny thing to me was I have always wanted to live in New York….You give me a good chick flick with New York scenes, i.e. “You’ve Got Mail” and I am there. I have told my husband and he has always known of my desire to go to the Big Apple and has told me plenty of times he would take me someday, I am still waiting, not in a hurry, I will go when it is the right time for me to, But I never knew I had that dream so young…to be an Artist and live in NYC! I may never be a famous artist, I realize my limitations but I might just get there someday? For this time in my life, the Lord made a different path to take, He set me on HIS path and it has been rewarding and a blessing, He gave me so much more than I had ever dreamed of, I am blessed. But someday I will go. This brings me finally to the point…I had a dream, hopes of a future, I always knew there could be MORE! It boggles my mind at the inability of the younger than me people of today who have nothing they want to do, not about money or success, but a dream, a hope of if there was nothing standing in their way. I don’t really know what to make of it, it saddens me, once a person looses hope, what is left? There is a song that Martina McBride made famous a few years ago, which to this day makes me cry when I hear it. It talks about getting out there and going for it, whatever IT is, just at least try…just dance! That is what I hope for my own precious children whom I have attempted to have influence on these past 26 years….JUST DANCE! Whatever you want in your heart of hearts, whatever it takes to make it happen…go for it. The worst thing that could happen is you could fail…so what. Failure is sometimes the best thing. It can cause us to get up and try again, which in turn builds character and faith and causes us to live and not waste away with what could have been. I still have hopes and dreams, I am not to old, I know there must be more and I will not miss the chance to dance( with my beautiful husband, hand in hand) and one day it might just be in New York, New York!!!

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Amazing Love

Christianity, Family, GOD, LIFE, love, , , , , , , , ,

As I write my thoughts today, I am reminded of the most memorable day of my life with the exception of my Wedding Day, which was of course the day that changed my destiny forever.

But the memories that I have today are of the most amazing event that could ever happen. At the time I had only known about God for a few short months, I had only snip its of the awe inducing world of God and they weren’t much. I do attribute any knowledge of Biblical matters to my sister who is right above me in the birth order. There would be times when I would have questions, I would hear about it in school; this was back when it was normal to hear about God and the baby JESUS at school, and I would ask my sister. She being an avid reader, to the point of that’s all she did when she had the time after farm and house chores, she would ALWAYS find the event in the BIBLE and make me read about it. NEVER would she just cut to the chase and tell me, I would have to work for it and of course this would full fill her need to make me read more, for which I now thank her, I finally like to read, it is a delicacy in the world of four kids.

But back then I really only knew the high points, Christmas, Easter blah, blah, blah! At the time of my first pregnancy I had only given my heart to this God I speak of about a year earlier and being a new christian I was in the baby steps myself. I did have a good teacher thou, my new husband was raised in the “way” of the Lord. He had not always been all fired up about it but as the scripture states (paraphrased a lot) teach them and when they are old they will always return to it! It worked…He came back to it or should I say the Lord and he did it in a big way, all in that one was.. I was glad but he really got sold out and here I am twenty eight years later a preachers wife…..geez!

This brings me to this amazing event that was about to happen, how can after all the new events that had happened to me in the past nearly two years, married to my best friend (love of my life, funniest guy I ever met and loves me more than I deserve), salvation (getting to live in heaven someday and dodging the impending doom I was headed for) and now this…..the greatest miracle ever done. People say that it is a great thing but even a dog can do it and a lot more at one time ( I assume a man said that not that I am male bashing but really?) This momentous event is the birth of my first child. This is even more of a miracle than the obvious and anyone who ever knew me could attest to that fact. I was reminded recently that I had written in my High School Annual(Go Patriots ’77) that I thought then I would probably become a teacher and at a last resort get married. My hopes were not high at that time, I was a scrawny high school senior who had not yet crossed over to the maturity level of my peers at least physically.

Needless to say I didn’t get asked out much, I had lots of big brothers though which was actually more fun! The idea of marriage and kids were ridiculous and I am not exactly sure how it happened, maybe I was sold into white slavery, ambushed by a masked man who kidnapped me and brainwashed me? HaHa Nope, just saw a boy who was scary……..(Robert Redford-like) beautiful and blonde….that’s all she wrote…I was bitten..the love bug won…yeah for love bugs! This brings me to the birth…that event that made time stand still, on this day I became a mommie, I fell in love in a way that is only understood by those that have had the same event happen to them…wow it is amazing, the amazing love! How could this squishy little punk have such an impact on a reasonably smart woman. First of all, how in this world did all that happen inside of ME! Seriously, who thought that up? And how did he figure all that out? Never did I ever realize the existence of GOD as I did at that moment…wowza! did that really happen? I was awake, although I had a C-section….surprise! scary and totally foreign….I had never been in the hospital before and it was freaky and a bit unexpected, I was secretly happy, the thought of screaming my guts out and pushing that almost ten pounder through that Holy of Holies….well, that was an awful part of the event, Gods little gotcha….stupid apple, Eve what in the heck were you thinkin’, thanks for causing all of eternity to suffer well, the girls, typical! Not me sista..I got a pass, and boy o’ boy was I happy…five days of bed rest and pampering by my scared to death husband. He was as flipped out by the rush into surgery as I was. Worked in my favor though so cool. I never looked back, that’s the way to go, I say.
 
So I was alert and I still say…how did that all happen, God is so smart, he is God for pete’s sake. This is an undeniable fact….HE really does know what he is doing, that is awesome, building a whole person inside one young girls body. Totally terrific and amazing, that is the only word for it….AMAZING!
 
God gave me a little boy, we named him after his daddy, a junior, and it was the incredible thing that made me know how tender and precious life is. It all went well, he was strong and perfect and I was in love..immediately. How could God allow this to happen within Mary’s womb and allow his only son to be slaughtered by his own people, the chosen ones. Why would HE go through the pain He must have had and give up the only real and precious person he created only to know he would suffer?
 
Amazing love, that is why. I get it…He loves me that much, we are all His children and He loves us all that much. I can’t see it and it must be why He is God. I know I couldn’t do it but HE did..thank you my sweet Lord. And now on the eve of my own first borns birth, twenty seven years ago, I am still in awe of the miracle of birth. I am thankful for that child of mine and the three others that followed but, I must say the first time is amazing…Happy Birthday to my first born.
 
The amazing love that I have for you, is pale in comparison to how much the Lord loves you. You have blessed my life and I am comforted in the fact that HE loves you even more than me and HE will always keep his hand on your life, choose Him everyday, HE picked you out especially for me and I am honored to be your mom. Even if you are a “pill” most days!
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