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Going Rogue

Today a person told me that a while back they had gone rogue…which did not turn out well…..which was to be expected. This has been a popular statement since the Presidential race four years ago when the VP choice was Sarah Palin and she was making a statement in her “matter of fact” way for which she was known for. She was going rogue to combat all the, what had to be frustrating, people who seemed to only speak of her with disdain.

This person was speaking of a time in their life when the flood gates of hell opened up wide, seeking to devour his very soul. And as it were, they nearly did. But Gods grace is sufficient and once again another chance is possible. The question I ask myself was, what pushes us to the point where this seems as if this is the only option? When all you do seems to be in vain and the road becomes way to long and hard, even though so many miles have been traveled on the right path……what is the reason for the chink in the chain?

Most of us are able to go along day to day when we have enough money or the car runs correctly or all the people in our lives remain level headed and we are at peace with everyone, ourselves and the Lord. But, (insert any aggravating calamity) when the day runs over, like a boiling pot…..the car breaks down in after work traffic…at a stop light! and it will cost nearly the price of another one to repair and the water bill didn’t get paid and after this awful day, we get home for a hot shower and drip, drip…..no water! AUGH!!! Then one more person asks a stupid question for the billionth time……CALGON…take me away! (but it can’t because NO WATER!!!!!)

What causes us to fall apart and choose to do something destructive……..brownies, ice cream, glass of wine, drugs…..screaming and yelling, spending money we don’t have, or anything that could be destructive depending what is a trigger in our lives. Why is it that at the times of most pressure we snap? Because that is just the way it is…..FREE WILL…….AUGH! again!

Yep, feels like HE has set us up for a fall but, NOOOOOO! HE gives us the ability to think and reason and know what decisions we should make. This is what separates us from the salamanders……this is one of the greatest blessings HE has given us. The opportunity to choose. The freedom to choose. The grace to choose. Going rogue is not an option when it comes to our lives of importance. We have this one chance to “do the right thing” and it seems we fight like crazy to do the wrong thing. AUGH!!

Everything in moderation is a good way to live…but when it involves triggers that can slam us right back at the doors of hell, then NOOOOO……. No moderation…NO nuttin’!!! Nancy Reagan was right! Just say NO! (gee I am very political today…odd) We have to learn that we just don’t go there, wherever our own specific there is. I have to picture the horses that race, they have blinders on that keep their eyes focused on the finish line. They are unable to turn their heads and look right or left, they just look toward the prize at the end of the race.

We are no different. Going rogue is not an option when it involves those choices we make that lead to destruction. I sure wish I could learn this myself ; about the time I think I can handle it……BAMM……triggers all over the place. As a mother some of my triggers are the ones I love the most. It is hard to look at the faces of those precious ones whom you have given your life for and say no. But this is love. As a woman it is hard to look at the face of those precious cakes/hot bread/all carbs!! and say no. As a christian it is hard to look at the face of my precious Lord and say no…….but I do, daily, when I don’t spend time in worship.

He deserves my best, he gave me his best and I hope in my days of rogue-ness I use it to go flat out full force rogue toward HIM!

The first verse I memorized 30 yrs ago

Trust in the LORD with all your heart
and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways acknowledge him,
and he will direct your paths.

Proverbs 3, 5-6

A prayer that is becoming real very quickly!

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.

Reinhold Niebuhr

In loving memory of

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